We present Jimmy Clyo as the Clyo kid with Peter Sinclair Patricia Burke Danny Ross and Diana day in Playing with Fire right mother that’s the washing up and the room tided hadn’t we better start getting ready to go out in a moment Susan I’m going to sit down for a minute but you said you wanted to be at the shops for two and I’ve still got to
CB your hair out well it’ll have to wait oh I hate Saturdays it’s all go where’s that chair oh that’s better would you like a cigarette mother oh thanks love just 5 minutes peace and quiet pop the reserves come on the black and oh no hi
Mom hey look this is the new football rattle me Grandad bought me me into the Smasher yes yes it’s very nice hey you’re not Ling look see look see look I am looking well look see look see I burnt me initials on it with a
Poker come on Crawford 5 one in look out Crawford Here Comes their fullback don’t go around him slip the ball through his Bandy legs will you shut up what’s up with you Scraggy neck mother’s trying to have five minutes peace and Chet well I’m not stopping her hey m’am what a game it’ll
Be this afternoon the reserves are trying out two players they’ve bought the Barker and Middleton Barker’s the new goalkeeper he’s taking the place of Rick van Wilkins oh oh old Charlie Wilkins the second team goalkeeper the one who keeps his pension boook under his cap don’t talk silly well he’s Bast it and
He’s Daft he so Daft that next to him your boyfriend Alfie holes Dr Browski you and your jokes I’ll go and have a wash mother before I do your hair right he you sound tell Mom what you want is five minutes peace and quiet yes chunks would be a fine thing
Oh I wish you granted would hurry back and take you to that match why where’s he gone oh mran bought him called and then went out for a quick one to the Rosen Crown well he mustn’t be late back the Ki cff’s 230 I’ll I’ll look through
The window to see if anybody’s carrying him back home yes who do that oh there’s somebody coming up The Path man M does Grandad have a bald head and a dog collar what are you talking about well if he doesn’t the Vic’s calling oh the Vicor the Vicor and here’s me have
Dressed with MC’s in oh well SC where you are he’s seen you on dressed in your curers before you remember when you were in hospital oh don’t be silly keep him talking while I go upstairs and make myself presentable right momam I wonder what the Vicor wants he
Probably wants to ask Granddad if he’s lost a button off his shirt cuz he found it in his collector plate hello Vicor ohello young Bost James is it yes it is are you coming in oh thank you yes thank you uh is your mother
In yes uh she’ll be down in a minute uh would you come in the living room eh m yes thank you well James and how are things at school shocking how are things in church still working that one day Week you must come and find out for yourself sometime e you know James you don’t come very often to church especially for even song well don’t blame me blame the BBC they’ve got the Billy cotton banso on at the same time as your sermon verily this little sheep is going
To take some getting back into the full ah did I hear the front door just then oh it will be me Granddad back from the pub oh the public library come on in hiy oh that was a smashing joke about the Paran and the turkey bat you see the you see the B
Told it to You Ah that’s right when you nipped out for the paper she tells some good that young Philly she does that no I I I’ll just get that flask of whiskey for the M hello Grandad did you manage to change your library books oh hello Jim here’s
Some Cris for you from the Rosen Crown I’ve got a joke to tell you about a paron you see he was getting undressed Grandad the Vic’s here I well you see here oh hello vicer I I I I didn’t realize you were here good afternoon Mr Sinkler I’ve been
Looking on the wine when it was red no he drinks Brown L quiet hey feet don’t keep me standing about you you like a spare dinner that flask of Boo for the football match he you you you remember the Vicor yeah he went to the bath and oh good afternoon you oh yes it’s Mr higin botom of course yes I married you didn’t I
Yes no he married Mrs Igan bottom did sh all oh VI hello Vier what a pleasant surprise how long have you been here ever since you dashed upstairs so he won’t see in your cers that’ll do well what what can me do do for you Vicor will now I have called
About the clask and whisker oh no no no no no no the raffle tickets the raffle tickets yes for the church jumble sale this afternoon raffle tickets oh heck you said You’ get them printed and have them delivered to me Mrs clo yes that’s right I told Jimmy to collect
Them yesterday and let you have them did you collect those tickets well I um I no you’re you’re a you’re a naughty boy I told you those tickets had to go around to the victorage last night I even sent you off to the printer specially to get them yes I know Ma but
The printers were closed when I got there it it was after 6 you went to the fairr with my Al at half 5 oh did I I don’t remember that well you should do you sent doie to get a ball back on the coconut sh and he
Came home with a lump on his head that does it father Jimmy does not go to that football match this afternoon oh but it’s the two new players this afternoon well you won’t see them you’ll collect those raffle tickets take them to the church Hall and come straight
Back here and no football match for you oh but man don’t argue you deliberately disobeyed me so this is your punishment but I was looking forward to the match it’s not fair it’s not bloomy Ware My Punishment is greater than I can bear Genesis chapter 4 it’s a rotten
Dead Liberty James Bond chapter Nine well Alfie how’s you calling round well you see I wouldn’t to go around car soon said not to go around till five so that’s why I’ve call around now instead of 5 to tell her I won’t call around till 600 cuz I won’t be back to call at 5: something’s
Missing yes your brains that that big flower vs you always have on your table it’s gone yes Mom and Susan took it to sell at the vica’s blinking jumble sale oh is that where she’s gone going to Jumble sales I picked up some very funny
Bits of junk at jumble cell oh so you first met our Susan at a jumble cell now look you there’s nobody in to stop me thumping you so watch it sorry Alie I’ll Fed Up you see I was going to watch the reserves down at the stadium oh I
Remember you telling me you going with your granddad and old Iggy have they gone without you yeah they left me on my own with only the Goldfish and you to talk to and from here I can’t tell the difference hey look if you’re going to
Be rude I’ll just get on me back and go to the match it’ll take me half an hour to get there as it is but the Stadium’s only 5 minutes way how you riding there on your bike and carrying it I’m not talking about the reserves I mean the
First team the pl away old them yes well I hey I could go to Al them cuz all they said was I hadn’t to go and watch the reserves at the stadium well that’s why I called to tell Susan it might be six before I get back who said said what you
Want to go and watch the reserve oh me Pals they said uh don’t go and watch the reserves I think the me it’ll be rotten game of course there’s still the tickets to collect what are you going on about Alfie I’ve got a treat for you I’m
Taking you to watch the first team a told them on your bike thank you very much but uh on the way we’ll just call to see the Vicor what do we want to see the Vicor For one day you want him to marry you and ask who and he’ll be very good at helping you with your problems ah when I marry Susan won’t have any problems you will you know he love me for a Brother-in-law won’t it’s a smashing game Alfie you what the can’t you a smashing game the first team I told him it was a smashing game look let me concentrate when I’m driving hey Jimmy what wasn’t it a smashing game that’s what I just said traffic lights red I never
Saw not the traffic lights look I’m trying to Alfie Alfie pull up quick pull up you what I said pull up I can’t see oh I’m going to pull up never no what is it I was shouting for you to pull up it’s urgent oh not again you shouldn’t have had all that
Lemonade it’s not that look that toy shop over the road there’s smoke coming from under the door and look the Shop’s closed I bet there’s nobody in oh they I fireing nobody about Jimmy what are we going to do come on with me to that phone box all right oh you know Jimmy
There is not that much smoke well perhaps we’ve spotted it before it really got going here we are here’s the phone box right Jimmy I better form the fire brigade after all I’m a grownup well hurry up and ring them yeah well I’ll just read the instructions on the
Wall I know the proper thing to do now what does it say try Webster taxes for your next funeral the next funeral around here will be yours down 999 come on here we go you D de you’ve di Sixers do you want all the fireman to come round walking on the round
Zero oh come on hurry up if I don’t get home before 6 there’ll be another fire on my sit upon hello it’s a fire Miss yes hello yes a fire it’s a toy shop called Carters the street it’s the main road from Olden yeah that’s right Carter toy shop the smoke
Coming from under the door well uh thank you very much for your prompt help oh it was nothing Mr fireman we only did his duty didn’t we Alfie yes that’s right oh well Sunny you too did a good job except for your friend here when he kept treading on the
O’s pipe yeah now you know why I kept wanting to borrow your fireman’s ax yeah I see your point still it was fortunate you spotting that fire it’ll all go on my report you know you were just passing you said yes on my back you see we’ll
Run our way back from the match B me leg look Mr we’ll have to be going now we’re in a hurry oh hang on a minute you know Mr Carter who owns that shop will be very pleased with you when he gets back he’ll uh want to know who you are
Oh really well I’m called out be called come on Alfie let’s hop off no no wait wait a minute uh I must have your name no it’s all right mister just say we were a couple of unknown Heroes and leave it at that come on Alfie back to
Your bike all right then dra Mr fireman see you next bumy night no no wait a minute your names I want you oh all right Lads I’m coming oh thank goodness we got away from him look why didn’t you tell him what his names were because if
I had done your name would have been mud what do you mean he might have put his names in the paper and it would have all come out how you took me to the football match you told him when I wasn’t supposed to go oh I you are you mean you
Weren’t supposed to go I shouldn’t have threaten you no so play your cards right with me and I’ll see you don’t get into trouble at home me get in trouble yeah it was your idea you talk me into it there’s no such thing oh no whose back did we go
What mine and who paid for us to get in the ground well me and who bought me all that lemonade and that popcorn and them two hot dogs well I did well there you are then you haven’t got a leg to stand On come on doy Alfie oh no must be de as well as DFT oh it’s you Jim I’m sorry I kept you waiting but I’ve been up in the bathroom helping me dad to play with his boats yeah no you you death thing my mother
Said she was fed up here in the drip so I told you to shut up yeah now don’t be funny I’m talking about the tap leaking and any what have you come around to our house for have you read the evening paper yet no I give it to me dad first
And then my mom gets it to see what’s on the Telly and read the book and to see if you’re still alive oh never mind listen the story is in the evening paper how I saved the toy shop from being burnt down how did they
Find your name out my name’s not in they just call me the modest boy hero and it says they want me to come forward cuz the fire chief would like to send a letter to the parents of this shy young hero that’s me but best of all Alfie Mr Carter who
Owns the toy shop says he would like to give a reward to this modest young lad that’s me again oh what’s a Pity ain’t it why well you can’t go to him and collect the reward cuz you’d have to tell him your name and then it’ be in the paper and M
Your M would know that You’ gone out when she told you not to don’t worry about that just get your motorbike out and call with me to see Mr Carter at the toy shop but but what are you going to do I’ll just tell him I saved his shop I
Want the reward and my name is Aussie Higginbottom well Alf all thanks to you we’ve got here after the loing Shop’s closed oh well I’m sorry Jim you want to sell that mot bik and buy a pogo stick backs all right I just got some stuck in my feet B well you shouldn’t eat so fast yeah look we’d still have
Been in time if you hadn’t got me to go the wrong way put one way straight well it was a short cut it could have saved five minutes it could have got me 6 months when that policeman saw me and then you you’ve got to be clever haven’t
You and when he said this is a one way street you had to say that’s all right we’re only going one way well I thought he’d laugh anyway he won’t do anything about it he didn’t what do you mean he didn’t no I told him your father was Chief Inspector
Ballo hey Alfie there somebody just switched a light on in the back of the shop hello anybody in Mr Carter open up I think he’s coming off Che P you have a l off stop banging that doll I’m not opening it we’re closed shut locked up I
Know you’re closed but I have to see you Mr Carter look I Clos at 6:00 precisely on the doct to the minute after that I don’t open for anyone no one nobody not at all definitely not no hey Alfie it sounds the right block
For a toy shop I’ll bet his wife whs him up every Morning Mr cath he wants to see about the fire he had on Saturday yes I saved your shop what do you mean you’re the L who called the far Brigade PA for help raise the alarm yes I me myself the three of us with Y 999 99 C it out you
Said in the paper you wanted to see him oh yes I do indeed come in here wait a minute what’s this motorbike leather jacket you’re not one of them Mims are you Teddy Boys tups TS no he’s a friend a p of mug can we come in Mr Carter oh I
Suppose so yes come in oh thank you well Mr Carter uh what reward do I get no no no just a minute a second not so fast Al do I know you deserve the reward I’ve told you I’m the lad who save your shop the modest hero the shy
One well anyone could say that couldn’t they I mean I didn’t see you on Saturday I don’t even know your name I’m Aussie Higgin bottom aren’t I Alfie yes Jimmy Go aie Jimmy higging bottom Miss Mr Carter Jimmy’s my second name look Alfie saw me pH the fiber again didn’t you
Well now son if you are the lad you can have a reward with pleasure but anyone can say they save my shop and tell me their name now can you prove it of course he can give us your cap Jim look his names in there no you’re big no it says Jimmy
Cal well um that that’s his other name he told you Jimmy’s his second and C his maid name nickname he had two mothers fathers I must have got the wrong cup look I called the fiberg grade and the fireman thanked me afterwards and asked
Me who I was oh that’s it of course yes he though the fir officer in charge fir officer Jackson I’ll ring the fire station for up speak to him yes yes yes good good good I’ll go on the back and F then I will look around the shop to see what
You might want for the reward if you are the boy you know right Mr Carter the first thing I want to find Alfie is a first aid outfit with splints and bandages splints and bandages yes cuz the next time you forget I’m oie Higgin bottom you’ll be wearing them don’t be
Funny was just a slip of the tongue anybody could have done it if they were soft as you soft as me I’m warning you all right let’s have a look around the shop to see what I want do you do you think it’d let me have a football set what kind well a
Ball and Boots shorts and shirts for 11 of us two go post and Nets oh I’m sure don’t you ask him to me your partner look all you did was dial 999 it’s a good job it wasn’t a pet shop you’d have been asking for an elephant
No I wouldn’t I’d have asked for a dustman bird a dustman bird what’s that it’s a bit like you every time it opens its mouth out comes a load of rubbish you’re asking for a good in me well you’re lucky oie oie oie oh oh yes me how do you mean Mr
Carter well fir officer Jackson was just finishing his shift on duty pack it up clocking off so he said he’d call in on his way home and identify you oh good yes well while we’re waiting you may as well decide on what you want anything up
To a cost of say well you know £3 oh I see well come on Alfie while I’m looking at the sports gear you try the cuddly toys there’s a wall rust there that’s the living image of our Susan with a mustache you I won’t tell you again one more funny krack you
Oh yes no doubt about it Mr Carter young oi higen bomir is definitely our little hero thanks Mr Jackson good good good well lad I hope you didn’t mind me checking up like this but it was possible you could be the phony a trickster an imposter wasn’t it not unless I was
Triplers anyway uh can I have them roller skates as my reward of course yes certainly don’t bother to wrap them I’ll wear them now and Alfie can pull me home behind his motorbike oh no no no we can’t do it like that can we Mr Jackson
Oh no no of course not we H want your address so we can send a letter of thanks from the fire chief together with your reward from Mr Carter what no more modesty we want your parents to know just what you did Lord that’s what I’m
Afraid of look I’ll tell you what I’ll take the skates now and you can send the letter to Mr higginbottom uh M dad later the house is called Peace Haven 24 lavinder Road next to the Gas Works no no no no I’m afraid I will have
To send the roller skates I mean we want to do this thing properly but Mr Carter oh come on Jim it’s no use arguing no will you yes you’re right Alfie um oh all right Mr Carter they won’t be there before tomorrow will they no of course
Not no right well we’d better be going Alia come on well thanks very much Mr Carter that’s all my boy thank you and we thank you as well son oh that’s all right come on Alfie let’s get round to Aussie our house I mean you nearly got a kick on your ankle
There Jimmy egging bottom well you’ve had it you know o is going to be very pleased with his present don’t worry I’ll have them skates off him we’ll go and see him now while his dad’s out how do you know his dad will be out because it’s opening time mine aie might want
Something to keep his mouth short apart from my fist I I think we’ll have to give him a couple of OB well I think that’s what do you mean we well you’re in it as well I wouldn’t have seen the fire if you want take me
To the football match after me m’ said I couldn’t go you don’t want her to be cross with you do you you’re little twist I’m not giving Aussie too Shilling all right all right well give him a bob each let’s have yours well I don’t mind
Be half yeah there’s mine hey now let’s see yours chilling well I’m broke so could you lend me a shilling till payday all right yeah but I want it back on payday thanks hey just a minute when is pday don’t ask me you’re the one who’s Working here you are father lunch is on the table come on put your paper away and eat it while it’s hot all right my dear oh what’s keeping Jimmy did you call him in Susan three times he’s been on those roller skates since he got up
He probably slept in them oh Father will you call him tell him I’ll warm his seat for him from from the sound of that his seats probably burst into flames oh my goodness oh blo oh Jimmy Jimmy what have you done I’ve bent a wheel and brought me big
End Jimmy don’t be silly now come on show me where it hurts not in front of Susan and me Mom all right father take him in the other room all right Mom the Pain’s wearing off I don’t think I’ve broughten anything really from the crush it sounds
As if you’d broken the front door down oh shut up Scraggy Annie you wouldn’t care if I br leg oh but I would I take you to the vet myself all right Susan all right that’ll do that’s right Mom you and don’t you call her names it’s your own fault Jimmy
Skating in the hall I wish Aussie hadn’t sold them to yeah I can’t understand it they’re brand new and expensive from the look of them he and where did you get the money it was only two Bob to Bob uh down two Bob down I gave him anyway he
Couldn’t use him his feet are too big excuse me the front door was open ah there you are you little thief Mr Higgin bottom what do you mean hello Mrs clor this little but boy of yours I all feel well again mom what are you H about higgy those
Roller skates he’s got they belong to our dosy he gave them to me for two Bob I know you little twister the price on the box is three quid and you Tau toine to selling another to Bob well there’s your money back come on let’s have them
Skates no they mine you’re not getting them Jimmy give them to Mr hiin bottom oh momam do as your mother says you’re all rot what’s that all right all right I’m taking them off how Rosie got them for calling the fire engine when a shop was on fire he wouldn’t have the brains
To call for help if his trousers were on fire what was that um nothing was he the boy they mentioned in the paper that’s right the call him the shy hero it’s righted to pretend it wasn’t him even after i’ read the letter from
The fire chief but he had to admit it in the end that’s where I’ll kick him in the end shy hero Jimmy stop mumbling yeah one of these wheels is damaged Jimmy give Mr higen bottom that money back to pay for it well you mean he’s
Getting my two B Moll case yes you ought to be a ashamed of yourself taking advantage of Aussie like that after what he’s done don’t worry after what Aussie’s done tomorrow Al see gets everything he deserves we’ll carry him shoulder High to the [Applause] Canal those involved with the FID this week were Peter s’s grandfather Patricia Bur ‘s mother Danny Ross is Alfie Hall and Diana De Susan with Derek Gyer John Graham and Tony Melody the recording program was written by James Casey and Frank Rosco produced by James Casey and starred Jimmy Clyo as the kid [Applause] himself I thought you might like to know that finally I told him that I was the real hero after all a boy should tell the truth and a spanking only hurts for an hour while roller skates last for years so I told Granddad I’d call the F
Brigade handed him his slipper and bent over he smacked me and then he had the nerve to send me to bed for telling Lies here is Jimmy clo as the Clyo kid with Peter Sinclair Patricia Burke Danny Ross and Diana day in the Romantic higging [Applause] bottom all right P I’ll get the door hey m’am is that Alfie and Scraggy neck back already no they won’t be back for a couple of hours yet they’re
Playing tennis down in the Park oh well they won’t be back till after dark then cuz every time Alfie hits the ball in the bushes they spending hour looking for it look it’ll be Mr Higgin bottom and a friend who be a friend of Higgin bottom except me Granddad when he’s
Drunk that’ll do it’s a friend for you no friend of mine will be seen with Higgin bottom come over in then higgy Jimmy this is a little friend for you Jillian she’s staying at Mr Higgin bottoms but it’s a girl have they swept her for Aussie she’s Aussie’s cousin she’s
Stopping with us while a mother comes out of Hospital yes and since we’re all going out Jimmy we thought she could stay here and you’d keep her company but I’ve got to go out as well and I’m late what for I don’t know till I’ve thought of it I mean um don’t be
Silly go say hello to Jillian hello Jillian hello Jimmy you’re cousin ass’s best friend aren’t you I was where is fum anyway why isn’t he lumbered uh looking after you he’s gone to his Granny’s for a few days cuz Julian and her mother are going to be
Stopping with us well I think I’ll go and stop with my granny you haven’t got a granny well I could advertise for one look just behave yourself and Luke after Jillian until we get back we won’t be long well Jillian fancy you being captain of your school hocky team and
And and and the swimming team and all it’s it’s nothing really I’m captain of our junior football team yeah but it’s marvelous Jillian and you say you’re in the Athletics team as well well yes but I I don’t take part in track events I
Can do 15 ft in the long jump with the win against me an all you know jillan you must have been a very proud girl when you came out topping your exams well yes I was especially as I did well in math it’s my weakest subject 7 * 13
Is 91 I think you CL will you shut up well all all I’ve heard for the last 10 minutes is how marvelous Jillian is how she passed all her exams how she won the 100 yard Sprint with both legs down one nickering ah poor little Jimmy he don’t like it at
All when the spotlight is not on Him Jimmy Jillian’s here to see you I’m just getting in the bath momam oh well I won’t stay then I’m rather surprised though Jimmy having a bath tonight so are we my dear that’s the 50 side in three Days Jimmy I want to go home not wild Jillian’s hanging about outside why can’t I go because you’ll blab and tell her where I am so suppos she knocks on the door don’t answer it and she’ll go away all right I know one thing though what’s
That I wish I was in your house and not in this drafty Coal Shed Ma’am these last few days I’ve had as much as I can stand when is Jillian’s blooming Mountain going to take her away from Higgin bottoms look will you stop mourning she’ll only be here another few days till her mother gets really well again but anything could happen in a few
Days if the black and gang found out and mixed up with a girl do you know what they’ll do they’ll pin the coward’s badge on me oh what’s a terrible about that before they pin the badge on you they take all your clothes off don’t talk silly I’ll go and see who
It is if it’s Jillian I’ve gone for a quick trip around Jupiter in that space rocket ah I’m surprised at you Jimmy lad all this fuss and bother over a weak girl just because she’s taking a fancy to you it’s not funny Grandad she follows me everywhere I go well nearly
Everywhere well look she just wants to be your friend like go is your friend what difference does it make her being a girl well if you don’t know the difference Granddad it’s time you came to one of our biology classes come in will you father it’s Mr higgy botom Ang Jillian’s mother oh
Hello there higy hello Pete uh the wife select to bring a sister around so there she is oh uh well how how do you do Mrs Summers isn’t it that’s right Ethel Summers you can call me Ethel and you’re Peter aren’t you you’re a widower I believe
I’m a widow Mr sister told me no not that I’m a widow that you’re a widower and it’s right what she says she carry your age very well if I’m not being too forward Grandad it’s Alfie Hall in a skirt and blouse shut up you well it’s it’s nice
Of you to say so Mrs oh Ethel well this is my grandson Jimmy oh yes I’ve heard a lot about him from Jillian but I’m sure he’s a nice boy really so he’s not so bad not so bad as what now then aratio who oh you Mr higging bottom
That’s right htio Higgin bottom i’ forgotten you had a d funny um strange name your name will be on a tombstone if you don’t shut up why Jimmy uh would you both like a cup of tea uh no no thanks still I uh I can’t stop I’ve got an
Appointment with a point that’s enough from you there’s plenty of time a ratio I’ve been delighted to have a cup two lumps just a drop of milk I said to atio I must call and thank them for looking after Jillian didn’t IO yes that’s right
So my sister said he could run me around here in the taxi didn’t she atio yes that’s right it was good of him to do it because he usually has a nap after his dinner as soon as he’s finished the washing up dear her ratio yes that’s
A I’ll give you a ratio uh sorry Mr higging bottom but do you what use that washing up liquid that keeps your hands soft you’ll find out whether the my hands are soft in a minute AR you told me you were in The Merchant Navy Peter
Oh I I bet you had a responsible job what exactly was your position in the ship flat on his back being seasick me Mrs Summers would you care for a cake or some biscuits yes please have you ever been to China Peter China no only the place I’ve wanted to
Visit well why don’t you I mean uh if somebody gave me the money I’d be off tomorrow shall I start a collection Grandad TR you um I’ll go and get the tea ready if you’ll excuse me you’re a gladan I understand e oh I yes I belong
To Glasgow yeah and every Saturday Night glasgo Belongs to him for the last time will you keep quiet Timmy oh don’t don’t Shout at the lad Pete just belt him Scotland now there’s a romantic place all those glands and locks you must tell me all about it sometime oh
I’ve been delighted I’ve never been to Scotland but I did see that lovely show Brion I cried buckets that lovely moment when the young couple were up on the Wind swey what was that song she sang to him oh I remember will you stop your tickling J ah you can’t beat this one day Cricket Pete marvelous oh can you see all right ah I can see fine you’re a bit miserable today Pete what’s up have the found the shirt buttons in your gas meter again no Mr Higgin bottom I’ll tell you what’s wrong with me Grandad woman
Trouble you what yes it’s Jillian’s mother Mrs Summers she wants him to say I will but he won’t oh well you know you’re not the only one having trouble with my sister-in-law she thinks me and the wife should Fetch and carry for her like a couple of flunkies she even wanted to
Give her breakfast in bed but I cured her that I took up two eggs a pan of water and a primer stove and I said here TCH the Flaming things yourself well that’s nothing to what me granddad’s out to put up with she even went chasing after him in his second
Home the Rosen Crown don’t tell lies he’s telling the truth higy it was the night you were away on that taxi job I was playing darts and I was was just thrown for the double top when I heard her mating cry goe Peter it’s me
E I’m not joking she pooped me right off my aim I missed the board completely and hit a fellow who was playing snooker that’s right instead of double top he got a double bottom Jimmy stop trying to be funny yes look look get yourself a seek cushion and stuff it in your
Mouth oh that’s nice Grandad you sh shouting at me it was my idea to come here and hide yourself in the crowd where she won’t find you well for the on the Brat’s right Etha never find you here if she searches till the cows come home oh Mr stair
Peter well what do you know milking time [Applause] Already your granddad had a restless night last night yeah well he probably had a nightmare dreaming about Mrs Summer’s chasing him the woman’s only trying to be friendly friendly her I wouldn’t like her for a granny the wedding for to be a horror picture now don’t you say things like
That you ought to hear what me Granddad said he said she may be cold summers but from the look of her face it’ll be a hard winter I told you not to be cheeky me Granddad said that look we’ll ask him Grandad what this is quiet he’s going to sleep he’s
Gone don’t worry hey m’ don’t you sleep funny snor him with the tip of his tongue sticking out it looks like Mr branigan’s bold dog Jimmy that’ll do hey up is seeing a cat it’ll be Mrs Summers just leave him alone while I answer the door I wonder who that that this window
Is not too oh heck Granddad wake up granddad oh well what is it Grandad quick hide in the Coal Shed she’s at the front door what are you on about sumers is are coming in oh no yeah and she’s got a bloke with her one good thing though they’ve left Dracula’s daughter at
Home of course you’re not disturbing us father look who’s here hello Mr Sinclair Peter I mean oh hello Mrs Summers is brought her brother over Mr cartright this is my father Mr cartright do call me Reginald hello Mr sinlar great pleasure is it I mean how do you do and
This is my son Jimmy oh no surely not you couldn’t possible have a son of that age a Charming young woman like you you’re ping my leg got it right one ear that’s uh that’s very nice love you Mr C right but Reginald please insist well Reginald Jimmy is my
Son well and how are you my little lad fine you big fine I’ll go and make some tea I’ll come out and help p no no no me i’ love to yes and we have a chat Peter I’ve got something to tell you well something to show you really Grandad
She’s going to show you her muscles I’ve left it in me coat I’ll just go and get it really Reginald I can manage on my own oh I’m sure you seem a very capable woman as well as Charming but I can at least give you company there not surprise you Peter
Close your eyes and don’t open them till I tell you TI shut now I’m quite enjoying it Mrs Glu now I wonder what death ra did up to with me Mom in the kitchen well they’re always telling me if I never listen I’ll never
Learn so I will listen at the K oh yes sir indan Tea Plantation is a fascinating P did you just hear a strange song no only you I mean the weather you know is fabulous a warm sunny days beautiful moon L nights there it is again pardon I
Could have sworn that someone be in that door well stop your swearing it’s me uh perhaps it’s just the wind you’re right ma’am I shouldn’t have eaten all that Cottage By yes yes I can honestly say I’ve had a wonderful life on the plantation only one thing with missing Mrs
Clu Pat what’s that uh Regal someone to share my destiny my bad times as well as my good in short Someone Like You Mrs cther a woman how clever of him to notice you’re right there is someone behind that door and what are you doing behind this
Door listening what to you washing up i’ I’ve come to give you a hand well yes well we we’ve nearly finished haven’t we Reginal they’ve hardly got started yes well I just remembered I want to word with with father look you can help Mr Reginal with the washing not
But ma’am I’m busy I’ve got a lot to do if we don’t finish soon Jillian will be her right I’ll wash and you wipe not just now I have something to discuss with my sister plans for the future for all of us if you will excuse
Me honestly father what a relief to see the back of Reginald I couldn’t get away from him upstairs downstairs in the ladies now then I’m sure that Reginald’s after me well that eth’s just as bad with me well what about me with soy Gillian she keeps
Saying do I fancy aies for for me best man and how about celess for a honeymoon they aren’t a family they’re a walking marriage bureau oh don’t tell me they’re back if they are I’m going to have a bath put enough water in for the three of
Us well I’ll have to let them in I suppose oh momam yeah can I borrow you your eyebrow pencil please well if it’s that blooming jillion again I can draw a Tash on my face and crack on I’m the insurance man oh but I know how you feel the only
Good thing Jimmy is that they’ll be gone in a few days I can’t wait that long let’s beat them to it and then we great now come away then higy and tell p what you just told need oh I’ve got some bad news Mrs it’s that sister-in-law of
Mine eel big mouth and that brother of hers big soft Nelly they stopping another month oh no and the brat as well oh this is terrible another month of k p it’s me why did you have to pick on me don’t you know any other men that’s it another
Victim Granddad I’ve got it what an idea to Sol solve our problems all I need is the help of that great lover Alfie hot lips Hall now listen Jimmy tell s not to worry I won’t forget this time I’ll tie not me anky to make sure we I’ll tell and you can do me a favor I’m not giving you money twice in one day it’s not for me for me Granddad the tapping is
Greenhouse is jammed and he wanted to know if you’d fix it for him why did you say so I could have done it now well I’ve been guessing to you I want you here later I mean so long as you do it tonight it’ll be fine oh well well I’m I
Must go home now so I’ll do it when I come for Susan get half 6 he’ll be back you said yes we’ll all be back at at halfast 6 but you could have it done by then uh come at 6 I’ll see the green hous is open before
I leave and you can go straight in at 6 and by half past I’ll have you fixed you can have it fixed I mean all right I’ll be back I’ll be back at 6 good ter then Alfie Jimmy so far so good one flies in the web now for Mrs Summers the
Dragonfly now I better do this properly I know I’ll uh cover the phone with a handy like that BL did on the Telly hello can I speak to Mrs Su the new speaking is that you Peter I it is my dear your voice sounds strange sort of
Muffled I’ve got we golden new again I wanted to see about something very special to you see me now you mean no about 6:00 you can’t paron it’s a very bad line you want me to come to your house at 6:00 I and if there’s no answer
At the door come around the back cuz I’ll be working in the greenhous right Peter I’ll be there is this a surprise for me well more like a shock a shocking call to have see you at 61 goodbye you Ken byebye Peter or rather oyer and good riddens well now for us
Susan and Reckless Reggie it’s going to be a hot time in the old Greenhouse Tonight well that weren’t a bad do the Vicor Garden Party Mrs Clyo I quite enjoyed it especially the wine tasting fancy singing Nelly Dean on two glasses of Elderberry wine I don’t like the look of those dark clouds do you think we’re in for a storm definitely that lad of yours
Doesn’t shut up all right higy forget it well he’s been a menace all afternoon did you I introduce me to the Vicor this is Mr higgy botton Vicor he’s only here for the homemade beer I’m I’m sure it’s going to rain father well so long as we’re in the
House when it does yeah the greenhouse oh well we’ll have to go in the back way I uh bolted the front door and came out the back when I left what a silly thing to do oh well come on we’ll go around the back well there’s one good
Thing about this afternoon’s du Pete the wash relations didn’t take turn up I well it’s the first peaceful outing I’ve had for a fortnite yes I wonder why they didn’t come yes I wonder hey Grandad Luke somebody’s in the greenhouse what you can’t see anything from here all
Right I heard him then I I mean come and Luke here let me see come on higgy hi let’s have a look at your Holly Hawks I could do with a good laugh well look the key still on the Neil outside here oh thank goodness soone come oh
It’s been awful I’ve been stuck in this rotten green ass for over half an hour Alie old wait till all Su hears about this about what you and Alfie snugging among the sunflowers you little him I’ll clout you I’ll be doing the clouting Alfie if there is any you woman Chaser
Now look here Peter Mr Singler to you your baby snatcher woman of your age sneaking off into the greenhouse with my granddaughter’s boyfriend father how dare you don’t you interfere here part that’s right mind your own don’t argue with your father ma’am I I was fixing
The tap and she came in and shouted KY I dropped me Spanish she screamed at the door closing it was the wind what wind look Pete leave eel to me I’ll sort her out she’s nothing but a jazzy belly ask back your face don’t you dare her all forget I’m a gentleman gentleman
You’re a scotch Island ball and you’re an Old English father now let’s all calm down what’s all the shouting about sounds like a native Rising on the UT Plantation Susan so you’re with him yes we’ve been in the Cozy Cafe so brother R has been chasing you while sister’s carrying on with
Alfie that does it clear off both of you go on clear off now no look here old fell I’m not going to be don’t call me old fell I’ll I’ll I’ll clout him with your pension boot clout him with my P oh shut up you Willi you come on legal
We’re going I’m not stopping here to be insulted I see my solicitor oh Mrs cliu but what can he say how about goodbye Jimmy you’d better go and take Ethel home Reginald yes and when you get there pack your traps and get out of my house and take that Jillian with you
Hurry very well I’m not want to stay where I’m not wanted but I might remind you you your wife don’t remind me of my wife I’ve had a good day up till now very well cheer you everybody and goodbye oh what’s this all about Alie what’s
Happened don’t ask me I only come to menap Grandad you were great so were you what do you mean he arranged all this yes ma’am three phone calls to Ethel Reggie and our Susan a chat with Alfie and boom boom went the balloon oh no
Jimmy you awful boy he’s not a boy he’s a genius hey hiy why hasn’t my oie got his brains yeah I’m baffled baffled I am would somebody mind explaining how I came to be here well according to our teacher once upon a time there were two monkeys a mommy monkey and a daddy [Applause] monkey those involved with the the O kid this week were P sing Clair’s grandfather Patricia bur’s mother Danny Ross as Alfie Hall Diana day as Susan Tony Melody as Mr higginbottom Brian Truman as Reginal dfan oxenford as Jillian and Betty alberge as Ethel the program was written by James Casey and
Frank Rosco produced by James Casey and starred Jimmy Clyo as the kid himself now Mr hiin Bottom’s relatives have gone home I’ve been wondering if I made a mistake cuz Jillian gets lots of pocket money you see I if Mrs Summers had married me Granddad she’d be me
Granny and Jillian her daughter well I don’t see how the black Ang gang could say anything about me being treated to the pictures by me auntie Jillian [Applause] ch [Applause]
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