Dad don’t forget monkey brains yeah and we need more unicorn testicles that’s where dreams are born all right we’ll get those then head back to the restaurant I just need fresh kale for the burger of the day if looks could kale hey Reggie I didn’t know you guys
Shopped here for your restaurants what happened Pepe why is your face painted like a cat I lost my restaurant we’re trying to cheer him up I’m a kitty I’m a kitty you didn’t read the review three weeks after the Moody Foodies Hatchet job pe’s Taco join is a yoga studio a
Hot yoga studio I bet when it heats up it smells like taco meat like my underwear The Moody Foodies on a rampage he nitpicks every little thing Bob he said my bread was was stale well it is pretty stale Reggie that’s cuz I buy de old bread okay okay I’ve been mapping
The Moody foody’s patterns for months he follows a precise ethnic sequence in restaurants Asian European Latin American Like Larry King with his wives man you guys are obsessed with this critic you should be too according to my calculations you’re next um okay that’s fine disguise yeah when he reviewed my
Place he was dressed like a construction worker for me he was an ER doctor Ranger but listen Bob the guy’s got a TA before every meal he wipes his hands with a blue handkerchief blue watch for that Bob blue here you go $30 what no I didn’t
Ask for this nobody asks you describe it you buy it oh look he even got the huny can you draw me on a horse with a zombie riding behind me no draw a picture of my dad’s mustache really giving it to a caterpillar no don’t do that do it do it
Do it hold on to these sketches po they could save your restaurant uh TR my restaurant will be fine after all Reggie’s bread is stale and pepe your carne assada isn’t even beef carada is beef and trans noodles are so what I reuse my noodles if people don’t eat
Them all I’m supposed to just waste them it’s just no offense fellas but I I use fresh ingredients so you know I should be all right if this critic comes off fense taken here’s you on a horse with a zombie $50 dad pay the man no $50 for
That $50 is a l a horse and a zie dad that’s cheap for what you’re getting look if the critic comes it’s just another customer you know I know just a customer who can shut us down with one bad review that’s all I know he
Can destroy us Ln I don’t need a pep talk and if I did it’s him Dad it’s the Moody foodie Jean That’s Mike the mailman you’ve seen him every day for the past 5 years it’s the long con it’s him Tina that’s Jean long con thanks
Mike yeah thanks Mike I cannot hear you that’s got to be the food critic a civil warrian actor ah I can’t stand all that dreb gray no wonder they lost all right keep an eye out for the blue handkerchief hello you’re really sorry okay I’ll I’ll come do the battle for
The record the buttons are authentic all right everyone back to work we’re not going to stand around and wait for a food critic who may or may not ever show up Dad Dad another civil war re actor is here he must be fighting for the north it’s a hidic Jew Jean you know
That blue hanky blue hanky blue hanky blue hanky that’s blue hanky that’s a moody Foody blue hany BL hany right there BL hanky right therey quick circumcised Jean yeah yeah yeah yeah circumcise me circumcise me quick quick okay the Moody foodie is here in our rest restaurant this is happening
Now do you need a diversion I’ll scream cockro jeane but with this $2 bill that I took out of your wallet oh or tape it to his back that’s not how a bribe Works Tina yes it is now everybody calm down all right we just do what we do we give
Them a delicious meal we get a positive review and that’s that yeah cuz if we don’t it’s curtains we’re done Lynn stop pep talking let’s just take a deep breath not like that where’ Tina go she’s out taking the critics or no no no time for the charm bomb to
Explode hi there customer is someone hungry that’s why I’m here are you ready to order uh yeah I just need another second are you just going to stand there and stare at me uh-huh oh God Louise go get Tina shift’s over sweetheart let’s talk Palestine or in my order we could talk
About oh God Lynn go get Louise all right all right all right how we doing today the food here is so delicious I’m a customer try the pad tie M okay everyone great job back in the kitchen sorry about all that um I’d like to recommend the burger of the day the
If Looks Could kale Burger laughing I don’t think you got it looks good kale yeah I I got it I’ll have a cheeseburger coming right up that guy’s creeping me out okay got a little rocky out there but we rided the ship I set it up you
Knock it down right Dad yeah right thanks Tina smooth sailing just like every day so well what kind of burger did he order crap so I know we discuss having the burger of the day but I want to say you didn’t want that where did we land uh in
The end you seriously don’t remember no I do um cheeseburger just remember it I just remembered on my own cheeseburger got it uh-oh oh God that’s just a 3:00 fire your burger may take an extra minute in the meantime enjoy the show Jadee overdone and dry it’s like uh above and beyond right uh it’s not bad what about it insufferable what’s that maybe that just means he didn’t suffer that’s good news I’ve seen some murders in my line of work but what a hit job wait here’s something good the best part
Of the meal was continued on page 45 was the napkin I spread my food into thank you little napkin I screwed up the burger it’s my fault so it’s settled wait a minute you screwed up and you and you all right stop the finger pointing I’m sorry I sometimes I forget how
Horrible you all are at your jobs you’re all horrible sorry I mean you are horrible but I shouldn’t have said it so loud all right okay that’s enough of the but you are okay okay enough stop how bad can everybody be stop the yelling who cares about one bad review don’t be
Such a baby come come come this is one of my vacant spaces it used to be a burger restaurant hi Bob hey Mr Fish how are you hi Mrs Burger good uh Mr fisho this is still a burger restaurant yeah let us die slowly in peace you vulture
Right you are one bad review won’t sink the SS Bob will it you’re like a benign tumor with a little bit of hair and teeth I’m like a tumor with teeth sounds cute yes little man it’s a compliment let’s come back in a week it should be
Empty by then don’t worry Bobby people can make up their own minds you’d be surprised they don’t need some critic as long as we get Michelin recommended we’ll be fine order up what what something wrong with the burger no but it’s fine it’s just maybe
You missed the mark with this one as all you know just tastes a little overdone and dry or something overdone and dry Teddy you’re just quoting the review no I know it’s just now I have words to put to my tastes will you get a mind of your
Own Teddy I mean seriously with your dead eyes what my eyes aren’t dead he’s not dead no I’m fine and you Mort what did I what did I do whatever ly this review is going to be the end of us people think we’re terrible now not terrible we’re not terrible Bobby you
Know that look at me I know that but it doesn’t matter we have one crappy day and then everybody reads about it and now that’s what they think forever hey how about this place oh yeah well your haircuts overdone and dry and you your pants are
Overdone and dry look at your dumb face it’s overdone and dry get back here people where you going I want to review you yeah I’m going to review everyone you’re getting it overdone and dry over done and dry over done and dry overdone and dry two thumbs down my throat that’s
Just rude put it down Bobby just stop enough got it boy good day sir good day Louise actually you’ve had better days that’s why we’re here we’re the pr firm of Cooper maleno and TZ wait what happened to belur Tina here’s dad’s image before the review here’s dad’s
Image after the review Rock Bottom a they made a poster Bobby uh you guys were there too remember destroying our business hey hey hey um I’m pretty sure I was in selo that day I’m pretty sure you weren’t Jean all right all right let’s stop blaming and start gaming our
Firm specializes in image Rehabilitation this is our basic image cleaner package lunch is included our bad boy robot package comes with a boob job lunch not included your father doesn’t need his image clean he’s not a celebrity dad’s a local celebrity like eyebrow man remember before his eyebrows grew out
And he was just a parrot man I hate that parrot hi parrot no alert what no one knows about people’s bad days in other professions none of these jobs get reviewed by critics it support that doesn’t get reviewed sales analyst not reviewed stop torturing yourself you
Know what take off your Cranky Pants and go take a nap all right accounts receivable specialist what’s that sounds great I bet that job never gets Reviewed I love this song Bob in the house lot of emails mostly spam what is that Ramen t oh thought it was Ramen no tea hey what are we talking about I thought Kathy was making ramen for some reason I saw noodles nope just tea huh hey it’s Jason’s birthday did you
Sign the card not yet oh here to The J Man H it’s good cake my wife made it my wife Bor rat do it again Jeff get in here you got to hear this my wife yes no 26 47 48 49 50 Linda kids napkin holder ice cream machine oh come here
Dirty spot on the counter that I can never get out get over here I love you the hell is wrong with you I had a nightmare Lynn I worked in an office I had to sign a birthday card don’t touch me you’re all sweaty I hate signing birthday cards you sign ours actually
Your mother does it for me no sorry like we read those things where’s the money you know I realized I’m not a cubicle guy I can’t do it I can’t do anything fails I’m going to kill myself there he is that’s the spirit yep you should ask
For a redo a what a redo one time to get out of a Spanish test Kelly math has forced herself to throw up I mean v m then another time to get out of a math test she forced herself to get her period that’s how she got a read a redo
That’s genius we’ll get our period no a redo No period I’m going to walk over to the Moody Foody house and cook him dinner wh of dam 59m dad that’s right Jean thank you Tina this time I’m going to make the Moody foodie a great burger
All right if you think that’s the right move I trust you kind of chant me out redo redo redo redo let’s go watch this train wreck stalking dad quietly stalking dad quietly oh well well well the guy who couldn’t remember my order finds my address how’ you manage that well let’s
Just say some of my fellow disgruntled restaurant tours have been dump sacking your house oh yes the Flaming bags of poop but I’m not here to do that all right I I came here to cook you another Burger oh well that’s son I’d rather be
Dump sacked listen I I just want a redo of course you do great let’s get started then where’s the kitchen stop what is that it’s a taser ow that stings what is that supposed to do it’s supposed to incapacitate you I’m going to send in a
Bad review I am not shocked hey hey oh I’m calling the police don’t don’t wait I just want to cook you dinner I just want you to try my burger okay off of me just let me took you a burger you’re biting me get out stop Dad
We thought we should be here as your PR for oh yes this doesn’t look like a redo jle fight listen kids taping people to chairs is bad okay never do this we’re just helping him calm down so that he can enjoy this burger bye-bye frown now it’s a smile there Comfy good this is an old classic of mine it’s called The Girls Just Want to Have fennel Burger is that a nose laugh huh no oh I laugh Dad thanks Tina yeah me too don’t tie us up okay big boy bite no nuh no not happening uh-uh all aboard the
Burger are you expecting someone oh that must be my next kidnapper Bobby you in me Lynn what are you all doing here Linda told us about the redo we brought food from our restaurants I brought no food because that man he ruined my restaurant so how’s it going uh not great he won’t
Eat my burger what well that’s just rude Linda wait don’t Bobby you’ve taken him hostage oh no he’s in his own home hostage is a little much it’s not that no no hostage sounds about right shut up this is dark Bob real doc I’ll go get
The jumper cables out of my car no no no no no they should catch any blood or bodily fluids no blood no jumper cables yes jumper cables the man tasted you dad I just want him to eat my burger you taste my Bobby and you w’t eat his
Burger well we’ll just see about that won’t we now all aboard the burger train open up the tunnel little baby I tried that already it didn’t work oh we could make him eat Oh goodie are those the exact noodles I didn’t finish 3 months ago no oh there the noodles somebody
Didn’t finish yesterday so there oh yeah well eat this come well if you won’t eat our food then Chu on your reviews huh does this taste like enchiladas him no Pepe that’s not what I meant what now he tripped the silent alarm delivery I need someone to
Sign he’s seen too much no no no no no no no all right this redo is officially out of control just now that’s when it’s out of control uh breaking and entering kidnapping oh and now opening other people’s mail it’s not what I envisioned what the hell is this you bought Tin Cup
That’s a terrible movie you mean classic I like Tin Cup but it’s a bad movie right you ever see it no I didn’t see it then how do you know it’s bad I don’t know it’s it’s just bad right people think it’s bad I think I read a review
Of it or something say you didn’t bother to see the tin cups because some critic gave it a bad review hypocrite who knows maybe you would have love Tin Cups Tin Cup Tin Cup Tin Cups no it’s Tin Cup Tin Cup Tin Cup yes Tin Cup this is killing
Me good cuz it’s all your fault you’re right you know you may have taped down my arms but you have opened my eyes I’ll never give a bad review again yay in fact I’m going to go back and change all my bad reviews to glowing ones and add
Smiley faces fck do what you’re going to do to these guys nobody’s doing anything he did his job and you know what I’m going to go do mine come on let’s go back to our restaurants and cook those of you that still have restaurants oh that’s messed up he’s talking about
Me Bob’s got a point what are we even doing here I should be back at my restaurant smell checking the meats from now on I will only thumb sack him when I’m in the neighborhood but you took the fun out of it sorry you got mixed up in
This so uh what’s it going to take for you to forget about today ah $350 $ 350 yeah um all right fellas cough it up ah I don’t have a I forgot serious you’re not talking about me I uh have um $48 here give me the DVD you want Tin Cup
Does it have any special features yeah it’s got outake but they call them Mulligans oh come on before we cut this guy loose I just want one slap okay in the back of the head you should give him a purple nerle no Wet Willie what is a
Wet Willie a GMA mojado ah you do it I have no speed willly Wi okay one Wet Willie [Applause] now that’s how you make a birdie you’re in the Rough maav Boy that’s okay I like it rough is she still talking about golf one of the top five Don Johnson movies T cup are you still doing the half off your meal when you bring in a bad review
Promotion yes the promotion brought to you by PR giant Cooper great nice to have business back on track yeah but Bobby I’m still so nervous the cops are going to show up yeah I wonder he called the Cops H 911 what’s your emergency 911 what’s your emergency sir hello sir great another one of these calls get a girlfriend well if the cops come we need a plan we can put dad in address and tell him he’s our Aunt yeah we’ll call him Auntie man
Hands she came into town for dad’s funeral oh plot twist uh I’m not going to wear a dress pants suit okay fine I’ll go get some pants suits F show oh my God oh my God uh-oh you looking at the kids Christmas list again binders Lynn they put them in binders
This year I I think we need to explain to them what poor means you putting too much pressure on yourself on both of us we’re so poor Lynn and it’s Christmas again it keeps coming it never stops okay okay calm down it’s just sometimes this holiday makes me feel like I’m a
Failure hey hey hey you kiss Santa with that mouth come on look we’ll do all we can and it’ll be fine besides you know what the greatest gift of all is family you say that to the kids with a straight face yeah I know I was just trying it
Out what about Christmases for closes um needs a little work well we’ll figure it out the kids will be okay they know it’s not all about Christmas presents they know Christmas presents countdown now at 6 days 10 hours 35 minutes oh my God I’m not going to make it Jean be strong be
My big strong boy you guys look what I found at sale at the store these light up Christmas necklaces they were only a bck 99 for five can you believe that unbelievable blogging I mean I want to well I think it’s a sign that this is the year the Year of belra family
Christmas caroling oo oh no ah caroling mom we’ve had this talk we’re just not those kind of people I mean most people get their clothes dry clean they floss you know that’s the spirit come on guys we’ll go out to the suburbs to a nice tree with Pretty Lights where people
Will give us hot cocoa and cider with real cinnamon in it wait hot cocoa a mocha I call it naughty mud I just call it hot coco I didn’t know he had cool names for it and people will want to join us and our group will get bigger
And bigger until His Hands Across America singing carols and saving mankind oh Amity the albino polar bear cuup he’s on the news again turn it up damn it Amity the albino polar bear cub born at the bog Harbor Zoo only a few days ago is being called a Christmas
Barle Em makes non-albino polar bear cubs look like a sick joke oh he’s so cute it disgusts me oh Christmas barle I just got it come on Bob time to go Carolyn Teddy looking good yep it’s a shame I can only wear this sweater four months out of the
Year Bob’s Burgers Bob it’s your fa landlord Calvin fish oder oh hi Mr Fisher Bob I need you to deliver some food to my house I’m having a little party nothing weird so just bring whatever Mr Fisher actually I’m about to go carolling with my family so what why
Never mind Bob I don’t want to play the landlord card here but actually I do oh okay how much food do you need oh I don’t know just just bring five or six Foods over and out so Mr Fisher wants me to bring food which is troubling it’s
Definitely a human sacrifice party or Central grown up party Dad you need a Venetian mask and a thong stat stop it a bob what about caroling well we’ll just drop off some burgers and then we’ll go afterwards you’re getting sacrificed oh bobd be great at getting sacrificed he’s got the body for it Mhm okay I’ll be right back and they never saw him again what’s the password uh it’s Bob I’m just here to drop off some food that’s not it Felix let me in okay fine but if anyone asks you totally knew the password was PP poo poo1 234 they’re all
Down in the dungeon it’s what we call the basement oh boy oh God please don’t be something horrible oh they’re going to cover me with candy and eat me Bob welcome to the gingerbread gentleman’s annual gingerbread house competition everyone meet this year’s guest competitor Bob hello I don’t understand I’m just here
To drop off the food oh Bob you’re always is doing that confused food delivery man business what and I get why it’s hysterical now come with me and let’s uh get you into your tuxedo come come M Fisher what is going on Hey listen how are you at building
Gingerbread houses them together before she died it was kind of our thing yeah yeah yeah yeah okay okay okay forget about all that because I want you to enter this contest and lose what why because every year every damn year I lose you wouldn’t think it by the looks
Of them but those men out there those there are well they are some creative bastards okay I should really get going where is he all right while we’re waiting let’s warm up now repeat after Me Mr fishot can’t Felix lose for you what no he wishes only the eldest son in each founding family is allowed to compete well then why would I be allowed to compete because I’m the host this year and the host is allowed to pick one guest competitor I mean generally
They’re a lot richer and cleaner than you but I I only had this idea a couple of hours ago so well here we are as far as those guys are concerned you’re my wealthy woolly buddy uh listen sorry but I’m supposed to go carolling with my family you keep saying that it’s so
Strange hey what if you don’t have to pay the rent next month huh mhm we could use the money to get better Christmas presents for the kids that’s not what i’ do but sure okay okay I’ll do it fantastic and and you’re okay with being killed when you lose what oh I’m just
Kidding I am Mr fishot wants you to lose a gingerbread house contest but we need your beautiful soprano voice we needed to do this song you can’t spell Christmas without us it’s a classic I mean I’m not a soprano but if I do this we won’t have to pay rent next month and
We can use that money to buy you know what for the you know whoo who are the you know whoos yeah who were they hey Whispering Willies I’m going with Dad I want to see this gingerbread competition Madness me too yeah Dad we could cheer
You on like Dad Dad he’s our man if he can’t do it that’s good no kids you you go with your mom caroling will be fun too okay well sold me I bought it kids I want you to know I’m not trying to replace your father while we’re caroling
But if you so Choose You may call me caroling Dad thanks Teddy all right well we’ll go carolling around this neighborhood and then we’ll meet you back here Bob okay good luck losing dad you’re in your element do I uh look all right yeah I mean there’s nothing we can
Do about your face and your hair H so how how do you want me to lose simple if your house falls down it’s disqualified so just build it really tall and extremely unstable like like some of my properties what well not your place yeah you’re fine anyway right before the end
Down goes your house the judge declares a winner and a loser which won’t be me and Bing it’s over the judge what what judge god wow he is old is he alive it’s a good question let’s find out Godfrey there he is now let’s introduce everyone
This is August sharen Heimer we all call him Auggie I do not like it and this is downtown Randolph Bracken Brown wow you are really arching your eyebrow yes I’m in Fierce competition mode also it’s a medical thing I can’t always lower it when I want to and finally Samuel summer
Botom I like my houses like I like my women sturdy and Ginger okay and Bob as you know I’m Felix and I’m not jealous of you at all isn’t that nice so Bob just put your guns on the gun table and we can begin oh I I didn’t bring any
Guns no guns okay interesting well let’s get started haven’t you forgotten something we can’t really start until last year’s loser puts on the loser hat Calvin has to wear it every year it’s an old bed P it’s very shameful yikes wow Mr Fish od’s neighborhood really is beautiful yeah waa except for
That poor thing oh yeah what’s going on with that G oh man I know that place I’ve heard crazy stories about the guy that lives there stories not suitable for children like what Teddy okay I’ll tell you see all those bed sheets up in the window th stuff murder huh his
Parents used to live there with him but where are they now Florida murdered a delivery man went in there once never came out what happened to him they got married murdered they say he buried them all in the backyard and then he just went right on murdering murder murder murder murder
Murder hello sir murder all right Teddy you convinced me let’s go there no what the murder the murder part Teddy stop with your stories you’re ruining the vibe come on let’s go Carol the crap out of this place yeah I came here for hot chocolate not not
Chocolate I got to say gentlemen I’m feeling good about this year tell that to your party head H classic Ginger boom Felix I need more frosting come in here we go frosting Calvin more like losting ah another incredible Ginger boom uh look at Bob in general I mean
That’s bad right his whole deal uh okay so what’s uh everybody’s Christmas plans I was going to buy an island and flip it literally I’m going to have my cash washed and waxed it really needs it I’m going to treat myself to a new penis okay so no one spending it with family
No way nope wait what about your brother Felix oh right him oh uh look I have this uh extra plate under my arm maybe I could just uh join you guys Felix no be mine there’s a prize you didn’t know we chipped in and made an obscenely large
Donation to The Bog Harbor Zoo to procure a private Christmas Day cuddle session with Amity the albino polar bear cup he’s the it Bear right now he’s so fussy wow my kids would love that why uh because kids love baby animals I don’t think that’s right but they they do why
Do you guys want to cuddle a polar bear an albino polar bear cub cuddle is a very prestigious cuddle Bob I’ve cuddled a rhino baby a tiger baby and now I may cuddle an albino polar bear baby that’s such a good order to do it in thank you
Pay no attention to Bob everybody he’s not smart Ginger boom he’s also pear-shaped Ginger boom if a pair could be dumb and bad at things you know what I mean a dumb pair are the worst okay thank you and we will take our hot cocoa now so thank you sorry I
Don’t have any what what cider no cinnamon afraid not what about hot cocoa again no damn it but we don’t have any caring for you pal well I mean you already did it oh did we yeah we did okay good night then no no no no now
You join in oh uh hwk the angel hat the door is closing about all the Christmas things okay byebye then everybody peace on Earth and Sala mild uh great wait come with us join our Christmas Crusade I just want to shut this on you ah sugar plums um where are all the
Candy Wafers Auggie you’re hugging them aren’t you you’re a hoggy Huggy Look Who’s Talking Mr too many Jelly fruit slices Samuel what what are you building with those mini marshmallows oh just a mini snowman damn that’s brilliant so you’re just sticking peppermints everywhere then uh uh yeah it’s uh some
Ornamental filigre Bob I got to say your gingerbread scoring is exquisite oh uh thank you you just got to be firm but gentle show us um okay I don’t think that’s necessary party shush so firm but so gentle uh-huh and does your big fat belly get in the way
Bob um no it it doesn’t and what about your body odor Bob do you find that distracting I mean it’s like your armpits threw up wa oh my okay easy you smell like a stor shorts you smell like failure like stinky failure fights okay that’s it Calvin can I have a word with
You in the other room sure look I’m doing you a favor Mr Fish oder you can’t treat me like this what’s the matter Bob can’t handle my garbage mouth you mean trash talk trash bad game Bob so get used to it well get used to this I’m
Going to take you down I’m going to try to win this thing my kids would love that polar bear cuddle that would be an amazing Christmas present what no no we have a deal the deal’s off Mr Fish oder oh and you know who’s going to lose this
Contest you are potty head how’s that for garbage mouth pretty good actually wait po come back Augie pass me the gumdrops okay you don’t have to Shout uh-oh looks like someone’s Reiger breading and with so little time left pretty ballsy Bob well I had this sudden inspiration and I’m going to go for it since I’m in it to win it ah that is such a cool expression think about what you’re doing Bob oh have thought about
It well have you thought about this ow stop pitching my thigh stop putting your thigh between my fingers oh the Thrills of gingerbread house competition what’s wrong with these people a bunch of Christmas crumb bums H maybe we should just pack it in go home and drink the kind of hot cocoa that’s
Wine wait if we’re not going to get any cocoa the only that’s going to make this worthwhile is going to that creepy dark house no no no no no no no no no I got stuff to live for I have a pair of pants i’ lay away at the mall doesn’t anyone
Want to check out this crazy killer I mean bring Christmas spirit to this poor guy don’t tell your father fine go I’ll be right behind you protecting you in the back where it’s safe okay I’ll just ring the bell huh guess he’s not home hello okay Bob you got this a chance to
Give your kids the best Christmas ever no pressure just ignore Mr fishot ow oh is this not helpful hey where did all the tiny candy canes go Auggie what I needed them for my tiny candy cane trees but how the hell will my candy cripples walk wait there was one chocolate Santa
Left I need him I need chocolate Santa oh I may have eaten him you son of a time’s up contest over oh nuts why did we hide instead of keep running I don’t know I panicked oh my God oh my God this is how we die I knew
It I knew I was going to be like this I’m sorry Mom you’re great in a crisis there you are wait please don’t run away again sorry about the knife I was chopping hazelnuts for a winter salad you’re carolers right I love carolers love killing them or what nothing okay
Great talk bye no we are carolers and we will sink for you r r oh great why don’t you come a little closer so I can hear you better a little closer boy you guys are some small stepping carolers huh thanks judging judging Augie if I don’t win it’s on you
Oh is that right R off the big nose cry baby what about you you Santa snacker he was delicious you are so lucky all my guns are on the gun table and I’m not concealing any weapons so are you mister here we go what’s happening we’re pointing guns at each other’s
Gingerbread houses obviously come on Bob keep up where were you even hiding that let’s just say I have a high butt crack well if everybody’s doing It Felix don’t you grab a gun we’re having a moment here you think you’re so great Calvin just because you came out of mommy’s
Hoot n before me everybody just calm down I mean come on it’s just a stupid Gingerbread House contest don’t point at me back at the houses back at the houses r okay good night bye wait what do you know this One maybe BB’s right this is silly we should put our guns away Nice pipes H thanks I’m Oscar care for some hot coco uhhuh please that sounds good yeah yeah well it finally happened we finally shot up each other’s gingerbread houses I’m honestly surprised it took until this year well I just got to say thanks so much for inviting me to a competition
Where I was almost a casualty in a gingerbread Massacre calm down yeah take a chill pill you you know why I’m even here because I’m Mr Fisher’s tenant and he said I wouldn’t have to pay rent next month if I lost on purpose he’s ding huh that’s actually a pretty good idea yeah
Innovative thinking really well then he’s right sick of always being the loser huh Calvin yes I am every year I try and every year a potty head it’s a lot of pressure look I I I understand this time of year can be hard I’m under Christmas oh not that again please Bob
I’m talking about real pressure oh my God and Bob’s house is the least destroyed so I guess uh Bob wins oh my God so yeah in Hind sight maybe covering all the windows with bed sheets wasn’t the best idea I thought I was just being Frugal and creative I guess that kind of
Stuff does get the rumor mill grinding the rubber Bild people love to talk you know but they don’t always have the facts ah Tina looking at you what well Oscar anyone with a voice like yours can’t be a murderer and even if you are you’re still okay in my book so are you
I me you can tell us we’re cool uh no I’m not damn you did kill those high notes oh Uka go caroling with us oh and we can find finally do the song you can’t spell Christmas without us you could be our soprano I’d love to great but no killing us
Okay ah he’s got a chainsaw no it’s just his mug I can’t believe I won oh quick gloating hey does that mean the rest of us lost yep you’re all tied for last place well there’s some good news we’re all losers this is all Bob’s fault he
Called the competition stupid and I just went into a blind rage same here what you said was really hurtful Bob yeah they’re called feelings Bob look it up you guys I I I don’t really think it’s stupid I actually think this whole thing is kind of sweet you get together every
Year you build ging nice I mean under that rich loner exterior you’re all a bunch of softies who care about each other you’re like a weird little family even me uh yeah sure even you Godfrey I’m the fun one and I mean it it may sound cheesy but you know what the
Greatest gift of all is family oh sounds cheesy um I’m Calvin’s actual family just uh want to point that out hey maybe next year we don’t even have to pick a loser no we’re still that stays well until next year gentlemen what is that awful racket we chras should we shoot Them no wonder the ice caps are melting this bear is hot I changed my B about having kids I’m going to to have one and feed it to this bear cuz I love him so much he’s so cute but it’d be really hard to get stains off him ah best
Christmas ever Bob oh I want to pet him I want to pet him yeah can we have our turn now thanks again for letting us come Bob get ready for the cuddlebug you know Bob that family of yours they’re they’re lucky to have you thanks M fter
Okay now you say something nice about me do you have pretty eye sounds like a line Bob but Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Ah another day another dollar it’s not school if you love what you do guys I told Alex I’d wait for him uh are you two going to play that interesting not embarrassing game you made up what’s it called robot got something basement time Robo Wizard Quest there he is
Alex I tried to run here to meet you but it turns out I run slower than I walk which was um was a let down I’ll be honest Jean oh Jean Jean oh hey Courtney Doug Jean Courtney has a little favor to ask you uh okay what is it it’s a favor
Courtney get in Jump position um what are we with I need to see you lift Courtney you have to lift me Courtney is here just so and Jean when she hops up you just lift and turn 90° and then you I don’t want to no talking Jean sh LIF
Her lift me Courtney jump jump come on Jean lift lift me Jean come on come on let’s go Bravo that was really exciting wow I wish our dad made people left us okay can I go now Kelvin had to drop out his parents improv troop is going on
Tour again and her roller dancing competition is on on Saturday sounds glamorous oh it is honey the wor of the skates the smell of the Hairspray the blood on the wood my dad was Junior Partners champion in 1983 84 sorry Dad God you get so weird about roller
Dancing so Jean what do you say can we count on you to be our replacement I’ve seen you skate at the school skating parties you’re fine we just need a good sturdy boy for Courtney to skate around will you make me the happiest skate dad
In the world uh no what sorry but I’m not the sturdy finest skating boy you’re looking for now excuse us Alex and I got to go see a robot about a wizard huh that is so weird Len are you still staring at that woman sitting in
Her car yeah she’s been there for hours Bob it’s so spooky uh-huh maybe she lives in her car in a car like that no way that car is nice I live in that car M yeah she’s wearing beautiful sunglasses too they look look like grantley very highend I watch a lot of
Makeover shows okay Bob jeez I didn’t say anything Teddy yeah well you’re judgy you’re making a face I see it okay so she’s wealthy and she’s been sitting in her car all day that’s a little weird oh I know she okay uh which one of us
Probably me remember when I got hit on the head a few weeks ago oh when you walked into a stop sign yeah I probably got a bad concussion and I have amnesia and Amnesia me went out at night and got in a high stakes poker game and 1,000
Dollars from her with my Amnesia poker skills so now she wants to kill me she wants to rip my freaking head off I bet she just walks in here and does it just like that dead Linda bouer now you die oh she got me she got me ooh gun glasses exciting she’s not
Here to kill you with gun glasses Lynn that’s so mean Bob don’t tell me I can’t get killed yeah but I don’t tell you why she can’t get killed sorry hey kids good day at school oh yeah we all graduated early and we don’t have to go anymore
Great enough chitchat Robo Wizard Quest calls oh right the game hi Alex hey Mr Burger it’s Bel sure he answers to both it’s fine no I I don’t wait Tina Louise are you guys going to play too no we watch and mock it delightfully all right
Go have fun kids and now the robot chooses a number choosing 27 Oh 27 is way over there and I must get there by hop only on circles that add up to less than 27 or the wizard will be Unleashed game okay here I go six 12 that makes 18 wrong oh wait
No that’s right oh no I landed on 10 I curse Thee I curse thee Jean I command you to melt robot melt hey kids snack time all right here we go some pretzels and hummus oh I love hummus hummus hummus hummus and humus little bit of a speed bump here I can’t
Have hummus why it’s healthy I’m allergic to Sesame it gives me uh Thunder Down Under talking about diarrhea cool but he’s not allergic to our secret handshake secret great handshake guys Jean I don’t know if I can wait while you wait for Alex Jimmy Junior started walking home 5
Minutes ago and I like to be exactly 2 minutes behind him I’m sure he’ll be here soon Courtney I already told you I’m not doing your roller thing we’re not here for you calm down um hi Jean Alex finally shall we get down to wisness um not exactly looks like some lucky duck
Is going to be Courtney’s dance partner and that two thumbs is me yay what come on Alex let’s roll get it cuz we’re going to roll our skat bye Jean no my friend not really it’s not a kidnapping thing keep Walking yeah oh hey Jean so I assume it went terribly with Courtney yesterday and she was very annoying and we’ll be playing Robo Wizard Quest after school today no Jean I uh it was great there was a lot of um touching wait do you like like Courtney no I mean yes not so
Much Courtney per se just I mean I like like every girl in our grade and Strawberry Shortcake I know she’s not real but my feelings for her are so you want to Roller dance instead of playing the game oh jean jean jean it’s just no girl ever has asked me to do anything
Before plus my mom is really excited that I’m getting exercise even though mostly I just stand there while Courtney skates around and then I try to lift her but it’s hard because the doctor actually diagnosed my arms with mainly calf muscles huh Alex hey you’re
Supposed to catch me oh was I I’m sorry don’t be silly I was joking partner I mean if you did catch me it would be pretty cool but it’s okay oh hi Jean hi so Alex why don’t we head to lunch sorry Jean he can’t the competition’s in 3
Days so daddy said we have to verbally rehearse at all times and a 1 2 3 4 Place stand the ticking of the clock I’m lying here the room’s pitch dark clockwise Circle spin stand and clap I wonder where you are tonight no answer on the telephone and half
Loop and the night goes by so very slow oh I hope that it won’t end though alone enthusiastic snap and tap till now I always got by on my own I never really cared until I met you and now it chills me to the Bone how do I get you
Alone how do I get you alone what poop Teddy she’s back the lady in the car and she is definitely staring at me creepy you know what I think she is she’s one of those ghosts who doesn’t know she’s dead Oh you mean dumb ghosts happens all the time probably your
Husband got killed right out there on the sidewalk right just walking along and attacking Bob she died many years later of natural causes but she never got over a husband’s tiger death so she just sits there in your car waiting to see him and she never gets to exercise
So she put on 10 ghost pounds both of you are nuts oh wait she’s getting out of her car and she’s coming over here she’s walking so slow We ghost steps she’s not a ghost Teddy no no no no no no no no okay that was
Actually weird I told you Bob O is a car ghost too Teddy what do you think car car oh my God car car Jean you all right there pal that’s macaroni and cheese and you are not eating it you okay my baby let me feel you forehead I’m not sick
I’m just I don’t know is BFF up and bf left oh no did you and Alex friend break up no I don’t want to talk about it Alex agreed to be Courtney’s roller dancing partner so now Jean has to be the wizard and the robot and the saddest boy in the
Basement a don’t worry I know a good friend for E Jean she’s about this tall and her name is Mommy but Alex and I had something special and now he just wants to be with Courtney and it’s all over well maybe you should just go down to
The roller rink and support Alex you could cheer for them or whatever you know that is really good advice it is I mean yeah I I I give good advice and girls you go with him and I could lose thousands of dollars in the claw machine I guess I could go there’s my
Boy that’s the spirit now how about having some oh you’re you’re eating maybe slow down never mind don’t do your thing look at him go no no I said cross hands like that cross hands it’s right there in the name Alex honey do you need a healthy snack
How about some seaweed cheese Mrs pepian please if he’s got low blood sugar he loses Focus I have some sprouted cashews right he does not need sprouted cashews Mrs pepian may I speak with you over near the skate rental counter ow Jean Jean why are you here
Are you here to mop hey Alex I thought if you had any downtime we could play our game right here at the rink let me just tape a couple of circles over here no I can play that with you later I’m here with Courtney and she’s dancing
With me and her dad is yelling at me and why can’t you just let me enjoy myself please so apparently I’m just going to sit here and quietly support you honey all right back to it guys Jean did you change your mind what are you doing here nothing you
Don’t deserve my brother yeah what she said but also I’m just going to get the M because we need it um at the restaurant bye sweetheart huh maybe it’s quit roller dance and he came to apologize see I knew you guys would work it out because I’m great at advice yeah you are
And it rubbing my feet fine give them to me yay that tickles Doug hello Jean I have a proposition for you I need you to help me make Alex disappear no yes what maybe explain yourself make Alex disappear why because Courtney will never win with him Jean he
Can barely lift her his claps are weak and his mother’s no walk in the park either true but no offense I don’t care if they win or lose I know only I care if she wins but you should care that you could lose Alex forever no one knows
What that’s like better than me in the year 1984 I was on top of the world dancing men’s synchronized pairs with my best friend Charlie cross and then he met a girl skater named Sharon he started skating with her and we were never friends again huh and now they’ve
Been married for 30 years it’s awful yuck yeah so you got to step in pal get Alex out of there and bring that trophy home I mean not really I’ll bring it home don’t touch it don’t touch the trophy and then I promise you I will find her a partner for the next
Competition and you and Alex can go right back to doing whatever the hell you want a boy there’s got to be something that you know that we can use against him well Sesame gives him diarrhea yes that’s perfect you can put some in a drink or something and give it
To him right before Showtime me yes it would be too suspicious if it came from me then when he gets the runs you run to the rescue don’t I need to like learn the routine you just need to nail the lift which I know you can do see you at 10:00 a.m.
Sharp Jean ah wait how much of that did you hear all of it I can’t believe you’re going to give Alex diarrhea I mean it’s hilarious but I thought you wed him yeah you’re not really going to do that right Jean damn right I am sister I’ll do whatever it takes to get
My buddy back including making him diarrhea himself at a roller rink it’s really the only way to show someone you care I know good morning kids who’s excited to wipe down menus I don’t know a psychopath kids it’s Saturday which means we might get customers so we might need your help
But Dad we’re taking your advice and going to support Alex and Courtney in their roller dancing competition uh wow yeah great since it was my advice you should probably go yep and we aren’t going there to try to stop Jean from doing anything bad to Alex at all oh
Okay aw my little supportive seagull and and I went to bring Alex his favorite drink which is anything that has sugar in it um well what’s in your hand Jane a spoonful of hummus no reason oh fine walking hummus I love it it seems just bring the spoon back oh and you should
Probably give me 100 quarters here’s three have fun kids all right time to get my paws on some cloth good luck ruining Alex’s life and or outfit Jean Jean are you sure you want to do this if you give Alex hot Sesame Squirts and he finds out he may
Never forgive you it’s a chance I got to take Tina Jean Hi how are you welcome roller rinks huh a lot of fun she’s back something weird is definitely going on she’s coming our way what what should we do nothing she’s just a person Teddy yeah I’m not taking
Any chances Bobby this is it she’s really coming this time no no back to the car wait wait she’s coming back again what’s happening de you guys alive no no never mind there she goes again oh okay that’s it bob what are you doing
I’m going to go talk to her how do it Bobby I’ll be fine Deddy I’m just going to figure out what’s going on okay but if she starts draging you to Hell give me a signal like this it’s just waving okay like this perfect huh hi uh I work at that
Restaurant right there my name is Bob and um I just wanted to check and see if everything is okay oh I’m so sorry I’m Brenda and I I only place and I can’t even do it I’m a little confused I’m a gorap phobic and my doctor wants me to face my fears
By going into a public place so I chose your restaurant to go into because it’s usually pretty empty no offense no it’s okay it’s true but I’m just too nervous what if there’s a fire and then I get trapped in there and then I’m trampled
And what if the lady in the glasses hits me no that’s my wife she won’t hit you I don’t think F God no I mean she definitely won’t look would it help if I walked you in uh I don’t know maybe that could work sh sh sh just be calm please be
Calm what’s the matter what’s the matter what I do what I do oh hey Jean hey sorry about the other day no that’s okay I freak out a lot too cool well I brought you a soda for good luck wow hey thanks Jean actually um I’m sorry I stopped
Playing Robo Wizard Quest with you I just got so excited to be around a girl thanks for understanding you’re a good friend I mean probably my best Friend no what the heck on Alex I was going to trick you and make you drink Sesame stuff so that you’d get diarrhea and then I could take your place as Courtney’s partner because Doug wanted me to because you can’t lift Courtney and your claps are weak so I said I
Would do it but I can’t do it I don’t want to give you diarrhea I’m sorry Jean I am mad that you wanted to give me diarrhea but I’m really happy that you decided not to do it cuz Jean it is a mess friends friends hey you know what maybe you
Should replace me I like trying to lift Courtney but I am not good at it I mean I did it once for a second but then we both fell over and actually her knee fell on my mouth and also my claps are weak see huh here all the way back and
Wow yeah there was literally no sound but I still don’t think I should replace you I’ve got a better idea let’s go find Courtney agoraphobia yes Lynn but we don’t have spiders in here no that’s Arachnophobia oh she’s afraid of public spaces and people oh like I would huge Hugh yeah
What did I say huge huge oh my God all right let’s try to focus here guys all right we need to help Brenda and she agreed to come back on a few conditions and I need you guys to listen listen I’m going to open the door and give her a
Wave and then she’s going to come in but you cannot talk to her you got that Teddy neither of going to look at this spot right here on the counter wait where to go shoot no I lost the spot I lost the spot down okay you guys are clearly
Ready so let’s just do this look away look Away Hi I’m Linda you know my cousin is afraid of church belts guys no oh no we blew it thank you I’ll be back tomorrow we did it we did it yay now she’ll never have any more problems she’s kind of annoying though right and now taking the stage Courtney wheeler and Alex
Papasian we’ll see about that woohoo Alex what the H double roller hockey sticks where’s Jean come on stuff shape with eyes I need you in my life hey Jean’s not out there I knew he’d make the right choice yes shape I gotta no no no no no Jean what are you
Doing I’m roller dancing with my friends Doug you’re going to get us disqualified I Cur the I curs me don’t curse me you cursed baby you are ruining our dreams you smelly little Burger boy I want to dance with them dad I don’t even like
Doing this this is your thing oh is it you tried to get my best friend to give me diarrhea in front of a girl he did what you son of a get away get away from me Mrs papasian get away Escape for your life who yeah I’m
Flying am I crazy or did we just win no you definitely did not win please clear the floor you rolled 20 I can do it I can do it okay 25 you lose no I curse Thee I curse thee you have to melt uh I’m melting I don’t know melt I am melting
Trust me so uh is this game fun once you get to know all the ins and outs and the players and the rules it is not I I think it looks like a hoot I want to play next round there’s a lot of math I’m great at math four why did you say
Four it’s math seven you’re saying numbers but that’s not necessarily math yeah but one of them’s going to be right 12 H even Stripes don’t help his body’s an enigma do they make an apron with a control top I think you look pretty dad stop it I just want a plain white one you can’t wear white you’re not a virgin Jane hey there’s Mr frond oh hello Bel your family classy martini set the
Name’s frond James frond I’ve got a license to council the below so sad Louise be nice why it’s Mr fraud ah Tina since I caught you your hch teacher Mrs Woods is going on disability OMG is she okay obviously I can’t share confidential details all I can say is
She’s a drug addict so until she comes back we’re folding homech in with metal shop metal shop say goodbye to your fingers you can build metal fingers boy it’s a shame to cancel home act I mean everybody needs to learn how to cook right a lot of kids aren’t lucky enough
To grow up in a restaurant oh so that’s what you tell yourself well Bob maybe you’d like to fill in as a substitute huh me teach wow I mean I can’t I I I’ve got the restaurant to run but it is an honor to pass on what you know to the
Next Generation right I mean Dad frond is right I can teach kids I did it with you Jean what the hell let’s do it wow this will be great I’ve never been teacher pet before but now I have a huge Head Start because Dad already likes me
Like is a strong word teacher pet the gold star of gold Stars what are you doing Tina nothing you’ll see well here I am all set for my first day oh my God you look so handsome just like Richard dfus and Mr Holland’s old penis um why are you carrying mom’s old purse oh I I thought it kind of looked
Like a briefcase go ahead and use it but let me take out my Pepper Sprite unless you want to cook with it if it’s anything like butter spray I’m in guys remember at school I’m Mr beler so treat me like you would any other substitute teacher that means you get a mean
Nickname and we assume you live a horribly depressing life in this case we know it’s true Bob you’re getting a nickname fun Mr belt stretcher Mr bowel chair no Dr fart Alonso poo poo fatty the third those are kind of all not very good bowel chair pretty good all right
Let’s go to school let me try a squirt of that pepper spray oh actually not so bad a what’s the matter Teddy you’re actually chewing your food instead of throwing your head back like a duck a is this the cousin you got to second base with no that was
My second cousin and it was third base what is it then there’s always dancing at weddings and I can’t dance you know Teddy I could teach you how to dance I taught myself look at me that is impressive right I don’t know I mean the wedding’s in 3 days that’s
Plenty of time it’s maybe too much time can they move it up I don’t think so they already right to the Bounce House bounce house pretty shishy hello class I’m uh Mr Bel Culture Your substitute I will be teaching you but I also look forward to each one of
You teaching me nice purse Mr be that’s it’s a briefcase man purse no it’s not a man purse anyway what have you guys covered so far pies omelets maybe you’ve tackled a casserole one time we made popsicles out of juice and then we made Juice by melting popsicles oh wait that
Was in science we don’t cook in home e we watch educational movies and I do funny commentary this really funny pre so put in a flick Mr B no no no today why don’t we actually do a little cooking cooking stupid the only cooking I do is an Indian
Bird I’m get your nail let him go play the movie Mov fart in my purse and I will use it movies movies movies movies you’re animals animal W wo wo wo wo what’s going on in here calm down children here’s your movie I’m here to teach your home you only take a sec nothing to make
Fun of yet I’m really enjoying it so far kids are horrible why do we keep making them do you need a hug no kind of no all right Bob I should have explained homech isn’t for honor students it’s where dumb Dums learn to make ice you know my
Daughter’s in that class right yes Bob I do okay but shouldn’t we be challenging these kids what like a fight I don’t want to fight those kids maybe the girls teaching them teaching them how to cook Bob the movies mellow them out it’s not like we can slip meds into their milk
Anymore what H I got to go wait I got lots to do but I’m not go I don’t want to go back in there so what’s the easiest step no steps if I wanted to see steps I’d go to a staircase right everyone’s a dancer you’re probably dancing all day long you
Don’t even know it there you just tugged up your pants to cover up your butt crack now that could be a mo okay tug and wiggle tug and wiggle right tar wiggle now let’s make you boom boom jugle come on Bill Cosby’s got nothing on me hey
Guys your belts are totally lost control of the Class D did great he broke down and cried quicker than any substitute teacher ever I didn’t cry oh the rumor that I started says otherwise I started a rumor you were diapers but so far no traction no I heard that yes nah just
Quit Bob you always have a job at Bob’s Burgers yeah that’ll cheer them up no you know what I’m not going to quit on those kids I just have to find a way to reach them shall I still be dancing I’m having chest pades keep
Going sorry I was all up in your grill about cooking yesterday don’t try to be our friend um all right well let’s fire up Chester the home exter meets Dustin the Dustin Cowboy those two are always getting into it oh anybody wants some microwave popcorn to go with the movie
Whoops I ripped the bag oh now I can’t have popcorn idiot hey everybody maybe there’s another way to make popcorn he’s trying to microwave without a microwave Mr Ba’s lost it God he’s lost it let’s see where he goes with this oh my God what’s happening we’re cooking Joselyn
That’s what’s happening what’s cooking no poopy tras or a poas it smells like real microwave popcorn hey who wants to make some kettle corn me me I did you rock Mr vure all right Anthony download too slow oh you got there in time come on there’s a line that was a great class
Mr Bel no we’re cool and all but just shut up sometimes right shut it got it shut it your dad’s really cool he’s married to a friend of mine what the heck happened here I’m not sure I think Dad might be a great teacher you’re dead rules hey I don’t appreciate your lack
Of sarcasm there’s a lot of competition for teachers Pat it’s a real petting zoo in there and shake it and shake it and shake it and shake it and stop shaking it Teddy I’m going to be frank okay you got the moves but there’s no fire I got
No fire no it’s okay because weddings have fire water fire water yes what is firew water it’s alcohol right okay it’s been helping men dance at weddings since the beginning of time come on you chug a lug and cut a rug well I got to fix a roof later but this is
Important out a boy will not be the first time I fallen off a roof hi I was wondering if I could borrow an egg I’m Bob The Substitute home teacher well well well Mr Bob The Substitute home teacher comes into my kitchen and wants to borrow a egg if you
Don’t have one it’s fine no let’s get you that egg oh thank you here it is that’s not an egg that’s your middle finger if you don’t want it sunny side up I can make it over easy finger upside down got it you want to see scrambled
Jeez little aggressive down here I mean aren we on the same team we both work for the school I don’t I work for cfco food services and cfco has a strict part find an egg someplace else I Guess just messing with you seriously I’ve got got a dozen over here on the Shelf Shez she really had me going I know that’s funny here you go here you go here you go here you go I got it you got a basket for these no I’m all set
Thank you thanks for your help take care Bob have a nice day yeah you too can you believe that guy substitute okay someone taste the soup and tell me what it needs oh look he chose me okay fine I’ll do it um salt I know that because I pay attention in
Class and I’m not texting like Jocelyn or late like Peter uh someone else Zeke you want try no I don’t need this stuff Mr B I ain’t going to college just try it Zeke I can’t do it Zeke no no one will laugh at you all right might as
Well try to zek it up I guess let’s see what we got all right uh let’s try some of this leafy stuff some of these orange flakes that look like fish food forget it forget it let’s invite some of this to the party o la la
Papa herea get your ass in here girl oh man go oh boy all right I probably wagged it it’s unbelievable shut up it’s amazing ni see you may have a perfect pallet do you know how rare that is get out of my mouth Mr B stop it see you
Can’t run away from your gift you got it you’ve got to give it a You’ got to give it a chance hell all right I’ll try it just don’t start something you can’t finish Mr B I won’t let you down seek anyhow the soup wasn’t perfect Tain put
Too much salt in go to hell Eek smells great yeah we should eat it right now hey you guys aren’t in this class please smells so good we’ll pay with our lunch money you guys we’re not in a restaurant go away well wait we could be no we’re not well that’s the
Act of Home Act a a restaurant oh yeah a home extant Jocelyn you can do your salads yay salad Peter you could be our beverage Guy what’s a beverage Jimmy junor can you handle the money I have a calculator you do the math and for our
Head chef the person who will wield the spatula Tina yes can you hand this to Zeke hell yes Tina give it to him come on let go Tina give him the spatula let go Tina let go it Tina we want to eat let go it to
Z where are all the food holes huh the rest of the kid backups what useless useless I’m sorry I’m sorry hild sorry here take an extra black and white bar yeah we got a problem no it’s Hildy look at us we’re packed yeah we’re busier than a monkey with six dingling
All right come on Jocelyn get your head get out of your butt ow how am I doing on dishwashing Mr beler Good Tina of course kids are looking the plates clean so it’s kind of easy right no if we’re going to keep up we need more manpower
No no no no no you don’t want me I’m a terrible employee check my references and she’s the one who trained me I didn’t even listen Jean you’re a waiter Louise your Hostess we need to turn some tables fine hello how was everything justess you didn’t like it just kidding
So unless there’s anything else maybe you should go now up up up up up up up drive safe thanks for coming so again I got open to to here give me a bald Kelly Ripper and a canoe with a brick taco no sck cream plus the brownie you
Got it really I didn’t even know what I meant I think I’m a great waiter I think I’m a great hostess maybe we’ve always been great yeah and we’ve just been working in a stcky restaurant I guess I know where I belong all right I want to transform a
Metal shop come in so go ask that guy to dance do it what if he say says no make them say yes with your body with my body right right yeah no I don’t want to dance what about now okay hey Bob I made this guy say yes
With my body great enjoy yourself sir yeah is all right hey you’re home from school early well I’m going back I’m just grabbing some plates for the second restaurant what second restaurant the home at class now it’s a home extant Lynn this teaching thing is unbelievable
I’m changing kids’ lives me too I feel like exactly the same I changed Teddy’s life um well I don’t know if we’re feeling quite the same thing Lyn I mean Teddy’s one life and he’s old not that it’s a competition no of course not but
Uh I bet none of these students can do this come on lift that guy up lift him up see that I got them up I’m going to spin light light light light Kevin are those new pants Cindy Ray you two back together so happy hey Paul when’s the
Cast coming off stop using those crutches as a crutch David come here sorry about your parents divorce it’s not your fault I love you man Donald the rat tail it’s coming back okay I’m going to the bathroom now I’m going to stop talking I didn’t mean to startle you
Just wanted to check in with the new lunch lady I’m not a lunch lady you sell lunches to kids you got I should probably get back to my classroom not so fast wash your hands that’s disgusting oh yeah you kind of threw me off my routine wash I prefer to do it myself
You got to get in there and you not wash my hair hotter water I got to get hotter water on this you’re hurting me that’s really hot ow God now that you’re all cleaned up this someone wants to talk to You get in the back get in the back lift the thing on the side the seat slides forward crawl under the seat belt I’ll hold it up okay um hello I’m Mr Platt Michael mauerman Mr mauerman retired my car s aren’t ready yet trust me they’ll look quite similar cfco Food Services
Bob we have an exclusive contract that you are in violation thereof come on your big Corporation has a problem with kids making food for other kids definitely if it’s bigger than a bake sale they call Michael mauerman then they reach me because I have his number
Now and I shut it down well I was hired by Mr frond so take it up with him oh I already have sorry I’m late I thought we were meeting in that hatchback over there Bob could you please make a little room I’m not going to sit on the hump
Can you be polite M just move over I don’t want to sit on your lap so I don’t want you to either Bob home xant and go back to movies or you’re fired no I I won’t do it to the kids then out you
Go what are you doing open the door so I can push him out Mr fr you not do that I can just curl up in the seat here let go if you would shim me forward no you you need to do is you’re pushing my neck I
Want to push you out stop pushing me I’ll just get out CS got you no you didn’t well yes I did I pushed you out and you’re fired so double burn on you I got out on my own well then uh you’re rehired get back in the car no I’m not
Falling for that no just just sit down on the edge of the seat no I’m walking away now thank you now you not bad L but what about yeah that’s okay Teddy for people who can’t do this and this and that and that and that maybe you were thinking of
This ooh ah o ooh ah out my face oh my God Lynn a ah ah this was a bad idea I should never dance I should never dance no Teddy this is what dancing’s all about not holding back Taking Chances yeah sometimes people get hit in the
Mouth so what you’re not you’re not bad mad Teddy I’m as proud as can be I got nothing more to teach you the only thing left to do now is kiss no what now dance dance out that door it’s your graduation taddy knows how to dance now move it get
Out of the restaurant I want you to leave now when you’re on the pants are streaky and your socks smelling freaky get some bleach oh uh sorry I uh I just need to get a couple things it’s Mr be save us please we don’t want to watch movies Mr
Bel we want you yeah we want to like cook stuff we miss you look kids I’m sorry this this wasn’t my idea I come on Mr Bel you got to stay okay okay okay okay okay children children okay everyone hush watch the movie Bob take your plates and go Wait Mr B stop it that’s a huge waste of popcorn get out Bob cfco one you’re done meat is done not people I just felt a little tingly there when you said that listen we can’t win this war but maybe we can go out cooking what if we serve
This school one more lunch the Home Ex rant is closed everyone’s already down in the cafeteria anyway it’s over yeah they are so we go to them let’s get this CH wagon what do we make Mr beler burgers burgers really wait like you don’t want burgers no no
No no that’s good that’s fine I thought but okay well we can no sounds like you married a burger so Burgers thought I heard bra’s lamb shanks all great after I bought all those gift certificates I can’t go back to my old job I burned a lot of bridges there to the cafeteria
Jean Lise hop on it’s the mobile home xer on Tina how are we fixed on ditches Tina where’s Tina she transferred to metal chop because her home teacher was treating her like Dale Brad Tina transferred oh my god I didn’t even realize she was gone wait everybody stop which way is metal shop
Look I welded a piece of metal to a piece of metal hi I’m Tina Tina hello Mr beler what are you doing here really cool things with metal at least I’m teacher pets somewhere no that’s Jeremy oh Tina I’m sorry I didn’t pay enough attention to you I’ve never taught a
Class before I didn’t know how to treat my own kid I wanted to be your favorite student not Zeke but you’re already my favorite eldest daughter yeah I can’t do anything right come with us Tina we’re going to serve one last lunch and we need you to dishes yes but you can also
Do prep okay bye everyone bye Jeremy there they are nice try bar don’t listen to him kids keep pushing we need speed Jane get off I just got comfortable get off your cushion and do some pushing stop oh goodness I’m jumping out of the way oh God it’s collapsing I have we can use
Metal the home exeron is back in business something get it w Them we got Burgers tomatoes and onions that I chopped because I’m in charge of prep Jocelyn’s doing it too but I’m more in charge than her no you’re not he said that I was no no don’t eat that eat that we need that money you you stop chewing
Hy get that food out of his mouth I of you eat the cafeteria ah forget it Hildy let’s go get drunk what do you mean get drunk yay we did it Mr B this will always be remembered till people forget by the way you guys are all getting an
Egg except for Tina yeah oh A+ thanks Mr beler it’s a pass spell class oh okay uh Pass Plus hey you want to take a break and get something to eat velure party of two your server will be right with you hi how’s uh everybody’s day so far
Getting better Fant fantastic I’ll be back with some Waters and tell you about our specials I could really use someone [Applause] Like and I said excuse me I know this one says buy one get one half off but can I just get the half off one the Shar guy hated that joke huh what else is going on with old Linda oh we’re giving the kids a lateer bedtime Bob and I were
On the fence about it but they did such a convincing PowerPoint so many Pig graphs and they promis to be little angels so we figured okay what’s the worst that could happen right they wake up groggy so they drink a little coffee kids in France drink coffee right and
They know how to speak French so you know uh-huh can I start cleaning your teeth now oh yeah yeah sorry just so much to catch up on when you only see the dentist you know as often as we come to you yeah I should be way more often
Right right I’ll just open my mouth now a okay maybe don’t make that noise first y cleans my teeth now I’m cleaning your clock Jean and another box it appears it is now my turn so I shall hope for the best prepare for the worst am I crazy or
Is that like the dreamiest fox scientist ever the first thing you said okay they’re all filled in let’s tally these babies up is it bad to be attracted to a cartoon fox that you don’t even know that well hold on no way Jean one wait guess who said your mommy’s teeth it’s
Slightly less plaque than usual was it Dr Yap cuz he’s our dentist I can’t believe it Jean won and I lost to Jean who won sounds weird when I say it out loud first only three cavities and now this could today get any better wow Jamie that’s so great with whatever that
Is what is that dots and boxes mother your baby boy is a dots and boxes winner yeah yeah yeah take it easy okay just going to see if our insurance is still good here fingers crossed huh H that’s fun are you like in the new plug-in air
Freshener I got it’s called laundry and spice H it’s strong good waiting room Vibe right sweet smells sweet Magazine spread sweet Zen someday we’ll get music Dr mallister has music in her waiting room I know and animals but you don’t work there anymore you work here and
It’s more fun right mhm I don’t miss it at all Dr yep do you give an extra toy to people who beat their sister in magazine games I mean I could give you more floss and then maybe you’d floss nah it’s not really for me Jean how
About we stop hogging the magazine huh buddy sorry hey you please don’t stroke the magazines yep yep I didn’t kiss it either when no one was looking okay let’s go eat a bunch of Taffy just kidding let’s get out of here Though hey Teddy but we’re not open yet that’s a rway play before the show plus I want to make sure I got my seat well you always do H H clean teeth alert come and through oh hey Teddy Teddy Teddy Teddy hey Linda kids I got my seat yeah
You did did that was the dentist great I swallowed a lot of that fluoride stuff but it’s good for you right it tastes nice so it must be good okay I fell in love I mean uh never mind it wasn’t a fox scientist I won a game in a magazine
And the world smiled okay okay it was one dots in boxes game and I don’t even know if it was regulation I mean the dot layout was a little doer than usual hey so no judgment but what’s going on with the bird poop on the window W giant bird
Poop oh my God judge you by the looks that bird was not well why would a bird do that to us did we take off a seagull or something I mean mom you yell all kinds of crazy stuff at seagulls that’s true well it’s not the first time
Someone has used this restaurant just for the bathroom maybe that’s just how seagulls do graffiti and that seagull is basically Banksy Bob you might want to get that off before you get people coming in here for lunch yeah yeah I I know Teddy folks seeing a giant poop
Smear right before the enter your restaurant that’s not good yeah I very much want to clean it off wait you’re using that uh yeah are you nuts there’s a very specific way you got to get bird poop off you can’t just wipe it with a rag Bob yeah Dad God I’m
Pretty sure it’s sure you can Dad you just have to believe oh maybe you can tie a rope around my waist and lower me down from the roof like a mission impossible I’ve always wanted to do that oh hey I know a guy who’s got a pressure
Washer he owes me for what I lent him my ratchet set his wife took his set in the divorce thankfully I got custody of mine Teddy no please it it’s fine I I will take care of it no no I’ll be quick don’t touch it while I’m gone you’ll
Make a big mess I mean you’re all great just don’t touch it excuse me don’t take my seat oh okay hello Dr Yap am I seeing double wait no you know what I mean twice in one day what’s the haps yep hey Dr Yap what you doing you Eden we’re not
Quite open for lunch yet and pardon our bird poop I I don’t know if we need to mention that Lynn oh I don’t mind waiting and I’ll just look away from the giant poop uh I’m going to go get our step ladder and see if I can reach it
And I’ll be a hero you you’ll all see hey guess what a crazy thing happened to me this morning oh yeah somebody bite you was it me nope someone stole a magazine from my office waiting area can you believe it oh no that’s terrible who would do such a thing I’ve never stolen
A magazine from an office unless I find a recipe I like or a perfume sample or just for The Rush of it wow sorry Dr yep did you call the police or the FBI not yet pretty nuts right I mean I purposely subscribe under the name drct don’t take
The everyone to see and you think that’d be enough well I hope whoever did that to you gets stung by a be right on their butt in the crack now how about some nice water I will get the water I mean I’m getting it already see water that
Water is stale I’ll get some fresh water from the kitchen sink sisters will you help me fetch the water seems like a one gene job yeah you’re going to do great help me fetch the water okay okay jeez Jean What’s your deal yeah I know you have have some spill issues when it
Comes to water transportation but you got to face those head on guys I stole the magazine sexy Fox scientist I mean uh oh man jean jean jean jean jean wow Jean I got to say I’m impressed never in a million years would I pin you for a dental office magazine stealer I
Didn’t mean to steal it it just happened all of a sudden the magazine was down my shorts next to my bum bum but why did you do it are you trying to get into a gang no nothing like that I just the dots and boxes game I won I wanted to
Keep it g one game I ate a weird breakfast this morning I was off plus there’s a a really fascinating article about bubbles that I wanted to read oh I skin that bubbles what’s popping some interesting stuff in there just please help me well the good news is you aren’t
Acting weird out there at all shut yap’s got nothing on you so we just have to we wait them out oh cool we have to not tell the truth to an adult cool cool cool cool all right better get that glass of fresh kitchen water that you
Were raving about ready for Yap Now give me the magazine we got to hide this I’ll hide it but let me just check something real quick hello there you’re looking well give me that you can have your freaky Fox thoughts later I forgot you guys broke our stepladder playing that
Game jump on the step ladder oh I love that game the kids get some exercise Bob are you sure we shouldn’t wait for Teddy to come back with the pressure cooker thingy pressure washer uh yes I’m sure I’m already uh halfway done oh no that’s not good it’s smearing
Everywhere ow oh my God it’s so so so much worse now maybe we try to use it to frost the window like stores do at Christmas time but we do it now huh boy I wouldn’t want to be you when Teddy gets back mhm whatever you’re doing is it
Working and here is that wonderful kitchen water I was telling you about this is how we always carry glasses yep yep mhm Dr Yap you’re not going to actually wait until we open are you then we what are you going to do eat here do you really want to put yourself through
That I do I cleared my schedule nothing on the books for the rest of the day so I’ve got all the time in the world what if there’s a dental emergency took my magazine hold on there you’re accusing us sweet little children of stealing on
What ground sir I know it was you kids and I know it because every time someone leaves my office I go and refan my magazines because I’m way better at it than my receptionist Dorothy and when I did that today which was right after you kids left my now that’s cool magazine
Was gone I am so sick and tired a patient stealing my magazines messing with the vibe in my waiting room I mean what if I came in and stole all your napkins doesn’t feel good does it I mean they’re there for people to take here I insist okay bad example just hand the
Magazine over into this hand right now high five sorry reflex down know sorry sorry you’re yapping up the wrong tree Yap we don’t know anything about whatever it is you were talking talking about now if you’ll excuse us we have child labor to do okay well that’s that
Then uh yeah I guess our words finally went into your face you know it sure be a shame if somebody told your parents about all this and you got your special later bedtime taken away how’d you know about that a little bird told me your
Mom your mom was a bird well it doesn’t matter cuz nobody took anything now we all need to go mop the kitchen floor together at the same time Tina Jean okay new plant Jean I’m sorry but you’re giving it back what no Louisa time it’s a part of the night where I’m
Pretty sure they say swears on TV even in commercials okay okay what about this we tell Yap that he won a big dentist award but he has to go pick it up in Canada and then he goes to Canada falls in love with the place and stays there
It won’t work Dr yap’s a huge Fourth of July fan he talks about sparklers a lot fine I’ll give it back wait wait wait how do we know yap’s not going to tell Mom and Dad anyway he’s out of his mind we got to be smart about this oh boy how
You doing you all right in here I just got to refill this bucket that bird poop is no joke hey is that your car out front Oh you mean the cool one yeah well you should probably move it down the street a little you’re going to get a
Ticket also it looks like your window’s kind of down I’m not saying that we live in a bad neighborhood but hey I would break into that oh yeah the window’s tricky it won’t roll up and there’s only one mechanic in town who works on this
Kind of Porsche wait what kind of por is that a Mazda okay I’m moving my car down the street but I’ll be right back back okay talking loud is fun that’s it yap’s car steal yap’s car so that stealing the magazine won’t seem like a big deal no
All we got to do is slip yap’s magazine back into his car through the window we never cop to taking it our record stays clean Bing Bang Boom we’re home free living it up as children of the night but Mom and Dad are out there de pooping
The window what if they see us they won’t why not cuz we’re going to be stealthy is that like you ready for this I guess okay operation put Dr yap’s magazine back in into his car so we can keep our later bedtime is a go ah sorry
I’m nervous it’s okay just a little grease cut on it and dirt and blood oh it’s probably Ketchup okay I repared my car and I’m back and now I’m even more annoyed because I tripped on the sidewalk in front of a bunch of cool kids okay yap’s back time to hit it come on let’s head out through the alley you guys I have a concern about operation put Dr yap’s
Magazine back into his car so we can keep our later bedtime is it about the name I had the same thought no it just what if Yap gets suspicious and comes and looks for us or Worse goes back outside and sees us good point Tina you should distract him what why you me
Because I’m going to be doing the magazine sneaking with my Nimble little hands and Jee can’t talk to Yap he’s a bundle of nerves and diarrhea not in that order but what do I even talk about I don’t know just be her usual Charming never socially awkward self uh there she
Is it doesn’t come off it just smears around more birds are evil I’ve lost all respect for them Get Ready jean just got to wait for the right moment hey Dr yep MH I uh uh uh ah what happened Bob I said I’ll be right back I told him to wait he just
Went ahead and poop was unlike any other substance on Earth okay what the hell are you thinking Bob just stop yelling hook up your thing and spray it off please that’s what I’m about to do I’m only yelling because I love you I love this window these are tough love yells
Why didn’t you listen to me both of you calm down we can’t let the bird win sorry I just uh it’s hard to see Bob screw stuff up so bad okay that’s hurtful all right I’m going to attach the hose Bob step away from the window please honey step away
Uh are you going to just keep making that noise uh no I was just thinking um why are they called teeth shouldn’t they be tooths our restaurant has booths not bee where’s the magazine Tina okay as soon as Teddy starts that hose I’m going in Jean give me the goods
It’s damn sorry I don’t have perfect dry butt like you so whenever you’re ready not so fast Bob first I got to put on my goggles okay just and gloves great okay now before we use this bad boy we got to consider any and all possible hazards I’m talking about slippery surfaces
Cracked glass pedestrians yes Teddy we’ll look out for those things just do it sorry but I’m a professional Bob okay turning it on work I’m guessing go go [Applause] go of it I’m going to pinch it I’m going to pinch it you sprayed everything except the poop I forgot how powerful this thing is the gloves might have made it harder to hold now that I think of it also I couldn’t see through the goggles
They fogged up pretty quick don’t worry I’m good now let’s do this okay I’m Letting Go oh no stop stop stop sorry Daddy’s our handyman he’s a nice person where is the magazine Tina I know right Hyo hello what are you up to watching the Waterworks out there huh
It’s like Vegas okay Bel your kids the yapster is done playing around I’m just going to tell your parents you stole my magazine and you’re going to be in so much trouble you’re going to go to sleep at 400 p.m. like little babies here I go
Wait Dr Yap are you sure you checked everywhere for that thing I mean I’m thinking about coming back with a search warrant to check your whole house no no no like uh between your couch cushions in your uh Pockets your uh Private Island I assume dentists have in your
Car so you think when I came here to look for my magazine I brought my magazine and left it in my car I mean yeah it makes sense the way you said it car yep I left three innocent children only to find out thought the magazine
Was in your car the whole time huh we get going on your burger soon Dr Yap just got to put some fries on to calm Teddy down first he’s a mess how are things going in here I’ll tell you after I go check my car for stuff oh I love
Stuff I have no idea how but it was in my car you don’t say oh my hey look at that you found a magazine you thought you lost I don’t know how it got in there maybe I accidentally fan the magazines too hard and it went into my
Dentist code I had been working out and then it fell out in the car I I mean I don’t know I okay bye I guess yep sounds good see you bye oh you leave him before you eat is it the pope it’s the pope isn’t it hold the phone why why a page
Has been ripped out um hi is everything okay no no it’s not Bob uh uh people read pages out of magazines all the time you have to build fires or make Ransom notes you’re both right oh but what’s this it appears the funny games page has been ripped out
That’s so interesting because I remember a certain someone bragging about beating their sister in dots and boxes who could that have been Jean did you later bedtime yes damn it I knew it that’s right Bob Linda your kids stole from me punish them as you see fit oh I don’t
Know maybe in the Bedtime Department hope you like going to bed before you even get up cuz it’s so early suckers y y y y y y y y yep yep yep can you stop doing that I wish I could y y Dr up I I I’m sorry the kid stole from
You I mean you probably could have just called and told us that but coming to the restaurant and waiting angrily until they gave it back to you is is also um uh totally fine that’s what I thought I can’t believe you kids you stole a magazine and then you lied about it
Apologize right now to Dr Yap it’s Dr Yap oh I’m sorry I thought you said my y it happens sometimes we’re sorry Dr wait it wasn’t Tina and Louisa’s fault they were covering for me I just really wanted to keep this I didn’t want to become a magazine burglar it’s just do
You know how often I win at stuff in this family uh for never I never win anytime we play board games or thinky games or that terrifying hanging game where a little Stickman has to die if you don’t I have on my hands I always lose but this time
I won and I don’t know I I wanted to remember it oh je huh I guess we kind of have something in common Jean we’re both dentists no I’m saying I know how it is when you feel like you just can’t win there are some dental office waiting
Rooms namely Dr Agnes mcallisters that are just impossible to compete with she’s got a cage of rabbits there are whole families that switch to her just so they can look at the rabbits I can’t have rabbits in my waiting room because the building doesn’t permit animals does
That make her better than me does it there’s a dentist office with rabbits where Tina mm- I guess what I’m saying is that I get it I could use a win sometimes too rabbits don’t even make sense they should be at the ear doctor or the fertility clinic why well cuz
Rabbits have a lot okay a My Little Genie zucchini I get that it felt good to beat your sister at the polka dot game dots and boxes right but I hope you know that you were so good at so many things and they’re not always easy to
Measure on a board game or a magazine page and uh hey some people are really good at those things like crazy good and that’s me but uh Jean squeaked out a win today and I’m proud of you you’re on the board and I’m coming for you next teeth
Cleaning so in 3 years yeah rematch thanks Louise bring it but not too hard but bring it oh and Jean this page I actually just want you to throw it out for me it’s all dirty and moist I’ll take it there’s a there’s a science thing I was interested in taking a look
At there’s my guy miss me Bob Linda everyone get out here hurry I got the poop off it looks great Teddy thank you oh looks good come outside come be part of this oh I think he’s crying we better go out it turns out I was pressure washing
From my arms but you got to pressure wash from your got and your heart and you also got to do it properly thank you teddy um Dr yep did you tell that guy he could reach into your car hey hey hey get away from my Mazerati I thought it was a Porsche
Parts it’s both mostly Honda how’s it ho night owls you kids liking you late at bedtime actually I’m feeling kind of tired oh not me I’m just closing my eyes during the commercials and if someone could bring me a blanket and tuck me in right here I can continue
Stay up thank you I was just having a dream about our later bedtime it was amazing you woke me up from it wow this is what it’s like you living the late bedtime life loveita late night so later bedtime means we have to carry all three kids to their beds now
Stack them up on the rug and we’ll slide them get their Feet [Applause] You know I’d love to come over and take a look at your couch scale but I can’t tonight because I have to help the kids with homework yeah they all have big tests tomorrow we do sh yeah on Saturday Saturday tests these kids today I tell you uhoh the hamburgers are burning I
Got to go what was that about yeah Saturday t do I look like I’m in Breakfast Club Gail got a new couch because the old one smelled like cat pee cuz she let the cats pee on it and the Goodwill only had a fold out and now
She’s worried it’s going to eat her and you’re just going to let that couch eat your sister mom would you let a couch eat Jean I worry you would that’s okay it’s how I want to go she’ll be fine besides I can’t hang out with Gail tonight because here she goes Ginger is
Coming to stay she drives here from 90 minutes away you don’t have to sing your Ginger song we gossip a bunch she stays over and needs some brunch two hearts be as one Ginger mom why don’t you just invite ankel over here well because I
Love Gil but I don’t want to add any other flavors to the Linda Ginger combo it’s perfect just the way it is on the beach he doesn’t even know the holds get out of here Ben go back to your gluten-free bakery Robert Linda children hey Nat guys I have the costumes for tonight
For the limo vitational the limo what the limo relay race for charity thing the kids and I are helping out with oh yeah raising money for people who can’t afford limo rides oh actually it’s for the Children’s Hospital oh yeah that’s better I can’t believe we get to be in a
Limo race how fast will we get going that 200 mph 300 how much face skin will I have left when it’s over please say none sorry Louise it’s not dangerous at all right wink wink I’m winking back at you because winking is fun but the limo vitational is more like a very slow
Relay race with wacky twists us drivers have to pick up three rounds of passengers and in each round there’s a specific Challenge and that’s where you guys come in which brings it back to the costumes Bob you’ll be a fancy businessman is fancy businessman code for mid-level cocaine dealer Gan and
Louise you’ll be my old ladies I’m a piggy for Wiggies come to Genie you wonderful old hair you and Tina I thought you’d like to be my prom queen wow oh my beautiful little Carrie I never finished the movie but she looked gorgeous in that dress and I bet she had
A great time at the the prom prom oh hello I caught you when you slid down the rainbow slide you did let’s kiss a prom kiss that’s an important kind of Kiss I know pral Lama dingdong we’ll find out the details of the challenges tonight be
Ready for anything sounds like a lot of work I’m just going to be ready for a few things you guys are going to have so much fun I’m almost jealous but I’m not because I get to spend my whole night with ginger I even got a blow up from
Stretching for the occasion kind of her hair dryer wasn’t working so she just fanned it with the hand really fast I also fashion my hair today because I will have someone special in the audience tonight ooh a new potential Mrs Nat on the horizon well no it’s just our
Second time hanging out but I like her a lot she and her daughter are going to be there tonight so I’d sure love to win it’d be really nice to win no pressure on anyone but I’d really love to win this one did you hear that everybody do
Not mess this up for her oh we’ll definitely win this thing and it’s not personal it’s just business sorry I was trying to get into character I’m not sure what businessmen say not that oh okay I got to go drop my lizards off at the groomer is that a euphemism see you
Guys tonight at 700 to the bog Harbor Speedway yeah you will well I’m going to go drop my lizards off at the groomers too excuse me a look at my elderly babies well this is quite a spread mom cheese make it nice V Jing I even got us a very
Expensive bottle of wine well it was expensive at one time but I got it on sale cheese me please no that’s Ginger cheese just one crack AAC uhh those are the good ones with the herbs in them I think they’re herbs maybe the seeds mini mushrooms oh la la someone’s tidy and
Whitey and looking all righty like a gorgeous albino sausage thank you how do I look how don’t you look oh you’re beautiful honey I know this isn’t my real prompt but I still feel excited it’s like a preview for a movie I know I’m going to love hey since I’m
Pretending to be a prom tee tonight could I maybe borrow the emergency phone like a real te and maybe I could text Jimmy junor a little bit I sure I guess that’s fine I’ll I’ll go get it great I already have it oh okay well we got to
Go have fun with ginger Len well it’s impossible not to because Ginger is kind St out of my roomes oh waiting is killing me oh now my armpits are killing me come on you two you’re coming with me there you go now you guys behave the
Rest of the night belur welcome to the limo vitational the biggest night in limo racing also the only night in limo racing thanks it’s nice to be out of the office sorry I keep trying to do business guy talk you do keep trying okay don’t look now but that woman right
Up there in the stands with the teen daughter is Peggy okay now let’s win this thing to impress her so she falls in love with me and marries me and has uh children with me and we share lizards together okay so the announcer over there will call out
Each round and let us know what the specific challenge will be for each passenger you guys want a hot dog for energy before the race starts I made them myself from scratch yes a hot dog for a hot Jean let me just see if Jimmy
Junor got any of my very cool texts that I sent him on the drive over here huh no response yet maybe I’ll just send one more so one more fun prom thought if proms for people what kind of dances would they go to again this is Tina sent
Texting from my family’s emergency phone but this is not an emergency Sand but I would love to hear back from you but no stress ha ha ha ha haha double hang loose emoji and send maybe it’s good you don’t have your own phone where are you Ginger hurry up and
Get here before I drink all the cheap wine and have to start drinking the less cheap wine hello oh hey you are you almost here you want to talk on the phone until you are oh HW your horn I’ll see if I can hear you oh no your car broke down
You can still get here without an engine right it’s mostly downhill no no you’re right safety first that’s okay hun yeah we can do it another time a poop Ginger well what am I supposed to do now I wanted to drink wine and talk to my girlfriend dang it well I may as well call Gail and make sure her couch didn’t eat her hey it’s me how’s it going no Gail don’t don’t glue your couch shut
All right limo Racers we’re ready to get started the first challenge is called keep that coffee off me each driver will have to take an important business person to their meeting but the twist is your client will be holding a briefcase in one hand and a huge cup of coffee in
The other get them to the conference room first without staining their white suit to win the round all right Bob here we go we’ll never speak to you again if you lose have fun wow this coffee is hot yep if you spill it’s going to burn your
Penis Bob get in get in get in I want to win for her love Okay hey you know I’m actually pretty good at this I guess all those years in the restaurant serving coffee paid off well we’re still on the straightaway Robert we’re about to get to the cone so look Aline back there oh oh God hang in there penis hello thanks for letting me come
Over I swear I heard the couch making a lip licking sound so what happened to helping the kids with the Saturday test oh yeah Bob Bob’s out with them now doing um night tutoring wine well maybe half a cup you know I’m trying to cut out liquids right right I can’t believe
You put all this out for me well uh you’re going through a lot with your couch and stuff cheers ow why’d you hit my glass sit over here if you’re going to be weird do you mind if I take my shoes off I have a foot fungus up to my
Ankles and it’s really itchy I’m just going to rub them on your rug oh no no oh that’s good here eat a cracker it’s got herbs it’s got herbs W this tastes weird that’s the herbs I don’t like them okay so do you know any good gossip well
I heard there’s a new Toyota Tacoma coming out with a ton of Manufacturers rebates wow who’s here huh I don’t know hi Len Gretchen what are you doing here you left us at the salon today I thought it was drugs but I don’t feel anything so I
Think it’s just regular food in a bag oh my travel fudge okay well I’m going to go see if I can sneak into the back of that bar I got banned from I’m going to get really drunk and win them over actually B’s here and we’re drinking
Some wine and she’s being very fun you want to come in sure I haven’t eaten yet so I should at least have wine in my stomach before I drink okay no coffee no coffee there huge pit stains maybe we don’t need to I mean just out of this
World siiz sweat marks comment on that but otherwise it is Nat Kinkle yes don’t reaction from Jimmy junr to my prom texts maybe it’s the reception I’ll just hold the phone up above my head and text every everything again I mean he’s probably just as obsessed about a Dance
3 years from now as you are right isn’t everybody obsessed with all the dances they have coming up in their lives I’m excited about the touchdown dance I have in case I get drafted into the NFL it’s a little emo and now for round two Flight of the living wed it’s time to
Take your two old ladies to the airport to catch a Redeye flight to their godson’s destination wedding they know the marriage won’t last but they love a buff Jean Louise you’re up come on Doris let’s go be old guess I’m Ethel you’re Doris and uh-oh on the way to the
Airport there’s a zombie apocalypse zombies he should have opened with that passengers you’re going to have to pop out the moon roof and use the provided squirt guns to try to mow down the most Undead friends yes p p p p p blast them little belur W I think this
Is the first time I’ve ever felt real joy and I’m Bing those hot dogs will do that turning on the fan ooh that’s the fancy stuff Peno gimo oh yeah uh I was saving it for later but I guess we might as well drink it I’ll go I bite on it
Like stupid wine glasses okay not the night I was expecting and I’m going to have to deep clean Gail’s foot fungus out of the carpet but Gail and Gretchen kind of fun hello Ginger they got your car started that’s great no no it’s it’s never too late oh okay hun I’ll see you
In 45 minutes so Ginger is coming and Gretchen and Gail are here maybe that’ll be fine can you hurry up with that mug and can you bring me some Vaseline for my feet a bunch of the skin is falling off nope nope can’t do it I’ll just send
These two home and have ginger alone what nothing coming ooh that’s a big skin flake ooh ooh Linda mug me I’m going to take some of this fancy wine and dip a cracker in it oh well you’re you’re not going to believe this but that was the
Wine company on the phone and it turns out that the Peno graio has been recalled it’s uh it’s got poison in it see this is why I’m getting off liquids how much poison we talking Linda you know me I can have a little poison no no
Let me give you some of this red but just like a glass cuz I bet in like 5 to 30 minutes we’ll be ready to go home right I know I am and I’m already home I know what we could do Linda remember when we were little and we used to prank
Call places and say is there a job here a big JW oh yeah we did used to do that I forgot but you can’t do that anymore everyone has caller ID w w uh-uh you can just do star67 you can call any ex-boyfriend at any time of day or night
And they won’t know it’s you no matter how many times you call or that’s what I heard I’ll do the first one these three sips of wine are making me wild give me the phone oh call my gym they’re open 24 hours and they’re stupid they won’t let
Me sleep on the treadmill uh yes hello this is Sandra is there a John there a Big John because I have diarrhea I have diarrhea that’s good it is pretty funny diarrhea do another do another okay maybe one more I’ll do it give me the phone give me the phone go Louise go
Jean I think they’re going to win oh uh yay uh I thought you’d be more into this zombie apocalypse thing because of your not weird Zombie thing but are you a little bit too worried about whether or not Jimmy junr texts you back just asking no I think I’m weing the right
Amount okay I I mean it’s just this dress got me thinking about prom and about going with Jimmy junr and I I was hoping Jimmy Junior would be excited about prom he’s kind of my prom go-to but if he’s not excited about prom then
I don’t know who I would go with and and and what if no one asked me to prom oh well Tina and now for the final round it’s prom in 60 seconds when your prom queen finds all alone in your limo oh no oh no all alone on
Prom Brown Queens whence say go you must run down the track and hide behind the trash can in your lane then wait for your driver to parallel park in these tiny spaces marked off by cones collect you and physically carry you back to the limo to get you to the
Prom oh boy you got this Tina this is it this is for all the chips wait there chips where you okay and Dr Queens go go Go Dana Dana where are you going going stop Tina Tina no Tina well do you have a big John or not Reggie no it’s n in the belby oh gosh is that the time I lost track we should probably call it a night huh really already no I’ve only had one
Mug of wine I’ve gone to my fencing class drunker than this hey you know I I I feel like um maybe I’m getting diarrhea all that diarrhea talk shook something up in there oh I can feel it coming on oh gosh it’s moving I’m running to the bathroom so uh just let
Yourselves out okay just go go go go okay all right I’m leaving oh I got all the wine we need honey okay I’ll see you soon okay who was that oh um no one was that Ginger Linda is she coming over here now is that why you were trying to get us
Out no wait Jing is coming over yeah Ginger her real friend the wine the cheese none of this was for me was it Linda I don’t even know if you do think my couch is trying to eat me I do G I do oh so that’s why you wouldn’t let me
Have into the good wine you didn’t want me to put in my garbage mouth I’m not worthy that’s right grle Gretchen no wait that’s not it I why couldn’t we hang out with ginger we’re not fun enough Len no it’s just that Ginger is special oh special Ginger la la la we
Better hurry so she doesn’t see us she’d probably throw up yeah we’ll get out of the way you know I hope you both do get diarrhea so you can Bond over how special it is no guys way come on let’s go to my apartment Gil I have some
Tequila someone left in the hallway we can drink oh my God what was that we both fell down the stairs a little bit oh no what was that I open the door into Gil’s head what do you care are you okay you’re okay right it hurts a little and
My Linda yeah ow sorry sorry believe it a nuts I feel awful K and Gretchen hate me is it bad that I was so glad to see Ginger she’s my friend and I wanted to spend some time on our R but when my night fell to sit set was I just exing
Gring and it’s B again I’m disgusting I know that Ginger cares for me but T night ging with there for me and we had fun calling about diarrhea on the phone I got to fix this I’m coming Gretchen and girl oh my face you stupid door Dana
Um are you okay can I come in or maybe you could open the door no thank you I can’t just leave you in the speedway bathro forever Tina it’s fine I can make it work look I I know you’re worried about prom in 3 years from now but hey
Bob what’s the status how’s our girl doing she she’s okay she’s just not coming out of the bathroom hey Tina you know I guess you could wind up without a date I could wait wait wait wait I you didn’t let me finish I was going to say
But I really doubt it if in 3 years you’re still this excited about the prom I’m sure you’re going to go date I know you’d rather go with the date and that’s probably what’s going to happen because you’re beautiful and smart and fun but if it doesn’t happen you’ll still have a
Good time because you’ll get a nice dress okay and you’ll dance and you’ll probably drink a little bit of alcohol even though you shouldn’t and you’ll look around and be like I don’t have to see any of these people ever again if I don’t want to you’ll have fun because
Tina you’re fun I will I am yes very much okay I’m going to come out now sorry did I ruin the race uh no I’m amazing at parallel par working and everyone else isn’t and they’re still trying to do it but we should get going now if we’re going to win this thing
Okay what do we do oh you’re picking me up okay bye guys look at her go that’s our Tina I meant Nat but Tina’s fine too and the winner is Nat Kinko we won oh I have so much adrenaline right now let’s slap each other in the face you want to slap that
Du yeah I’ll take One oh look Gail it’s ginger’s friend Linda what an honor can I come in sure hi Gail oh sorry Linda I didn’t hear you come in because we were having so much fun without you okay you’re both mad at me and you should be mad at me I was so
Focused on my other friend coming over that I didn’t see the friend and I’m sorry Gretchen you’re a great friend and and Gail you’re a great sister but am I also your friend Gail what yes just cuz I love Ginger and I love to spend time with her alone doesn’t mean you’re not
Special to me too you and I have something I’ll never have with her with family and there’s no stronger Bond than family except maybe if someone gives you a kidney or an eye who’s spooky a Linda I take your eye that one and I brought the good wine three mugs coming up
Actually is it okay if we do four oh that must be her I left a not for ginger to meet us over here I want all my girlfriends together tonight I don’t mind as long as she’s willing to fence me I was just about to fence scale but
I’ll fence her her instead you must be Ginger hi hun I’m still pretty early we could drive around and look for another limo race I’m in Dad hello hey CA it’s Jimmy Jr uh I just wanted to say hi and sorry if I missed prom was it tonight I think I didn’t pay
Attention during announcements or something oh no it’s not for 3 years oh okay that’s good so um I’ll call you back then not if I call you first what oh never mind uh good night Jim I knew they were good texts what nothing I meant to hang up
Bye hey is that Mom leaving that bar is normally I’m a fan of fi trips but on Halloween Halloween’s the one day school is actually pretty okay yeah I mean I love skipping gym for the costume parade but guys we’re going to the Celtic Farm’s historical apple orchard I went
There once when I was little people dress up in old timey clothes and teach you about ancient farming techniques it’s badass oh rude as long as we get back in time for the costume parade Jee and Tina and I are doing a group thing and not to brag but I’m the best part
And what part would that be exactly I’m Helen Hunt emphasis on the hunt when you see us together you’ll get it but it also works on its own yeah it does I mean after you explain it what are you again Jessica I’m Billy idolish It’s a combination of Billy Idol and Billy eyh
I get the ish part but not the idol he’s an 80s guy my dad loves this costume so that makes one person well the good thing about today is my dad’s a chaperon and he said we could do whatever we want break all the rules whatever I I didn’t
Say that Louis have you ever seen that movie The Purge he showed me that and said That’s you and your friends at the apple orchard go nuts I didn’t show her that movie whatever you say hey uh I looked up this apple orchard online and
I saw they have a beekeeper and bees is that part of the trip today because I’ve always been kind of curious about beekeeping so let’s keep today about the kids okay Dad oh okay Rudy sit down there I said it I’ve done my job a lot
Of us are missing her today here we go what Chloe barbash is out sick for one day and you and all the other little Chloe followers Chloe clingers Chloe clingers are acting like it’s the end of the world not the end of the world just
A sad day with no sun and all the birds are dead remind me what is so great about Chloe wow where to start she’s Charming she’s wise she’s sort of a thought leader oh my God and she does a great duck voice are we enjoying our lunches
I get it too goodbye okay I do kind of like the duck voice you know Chloe’s not some amazing miraculous being she’s just popular popularity is dumb even fidget Spinners were popular once aw now I missed my fidget spinner oh God oh God oh God o someone’s participating in the costume parade what
Are you that’s what I was wondering I was going to guess like who Hoopa the scary hula hoop vampire and hoopa’s mysterious friend or you maybe just going as a bunch of stuff from your house actually I’m the Twister from Twister and I’m Bill Paxton caught up in
The Twister from Twister when Louise gets back from her field trip she’ll be Helen Hunt from Twister H yeah you’re not trying too hard at all looks like your tornado’s dripping there oh that’ll help on it oops I lost an Oklahoma Farmhouse kind of high man with it
Another streamer here don’t move yet Tina needs more streamers Jean quit touching the cow the cow is not for touching Bobby wipe my brow well I’m sure you can hold those delicate Creations together till the costume parade it’s only most of the day away yeah and these costumes are you know not
That hard to walk in uh-huh if I leave for first period now I could maybe get there by lunch huh this is an apple orchard not a spooky Crow playground yeah I’m pretty sure that’s Crow for turn back turn back I think this will be fun or do I without Chloe
Here how am I supposed to know what’s lame and what’s cool yeah maybe we should write stuff down and show it to Chloe later what have we here fellow peasants come to join us in the orchard hello peasants I am Jolly Elenor and I am lowly Bram I see many strong laborers
Among this group yeah you do today we want to show you how land was farmed in the British Isles in the year 100 BC or as brah and I call it the right now times and in 100 BC aka the right now times we still believe the world is a
Mystical mysterious Place fun fact some Farmers from our time practice paganism and beseech the pagan gods to watch over the crops at the end of the day you will join us at our Harvest Festival where we ask the sun god to smile upon us and by Sun God I mean the vengeful Harvest
Deity of pagan times anyone can ask the sunod Luth to smile upon us no for that we need a hero of the Harvest someone special and worthy of such an honor someone held in esteem by their peers someone with that it Factor so at day’s end if the sacred corn cop points your
Way that means you may have the honor of helping bless our crops okay I forgot how weird this field trip is hi I I’m Bob I’m a a parent uh chaperon I heard there are bees at this Orchard i’ I’ve always been kind of interested in
Beekeeping I’m a chef in a restaurant I know your time doesn’t have restaurants yet did you have a question um I forgot it ju just looking forward to those bees keep it in your bees suit big guy now let our labors begin hell yeah Bob’s Burgers hey Mom hey kids wait why
Are you calling me do you both have diarrhea again someone sink no Mom it’s the costumes they’re not in great shape things are falling off a lot what do we do it’s embarrassing to admit but I never learned to glue uh I’ll come and fix them what yeah yeah I I’ll close the
Restaurant for uh just a few minutes and I’ll come and fix your costumes mom you can’t do that what if we get a customer hey this is the costume parade we’re talking about I’ll grab my supplies see you soon you’re the bravest person I know I love love you bye okay and over
Here is our Orchard you can tell by all the apple trees hey look at that and as TV has taught me where there’s a barn there’s a haly loft which I believe is a fun thing to jump off of especially when you’re on a field trip on a farm I’m on
A field trip on a farm I say we try to sink away later and see if we can’t have a little jump Louise Jessica move it coming we’ll be back for you hey if you’re there stay fluffy the Apple from gnarled and twisting branches comes this sweet and rolent gift let’s consider her
Shall we we shall oh man going to be hard to hang in there until Hal Loft time if there’s a Hal Loft yeah apples more like apples cuz this place makes me want to take a nap no I got it huh what oh nothing I thought I saw
Something but I didn’t that’s a great story girls oh Ro please you creeping the Out Okay who wants to hear about cutting edge up to the minute fertilizing techniques yes please we peasants fertilize these apple trees using something we put possessing great amounts apples oranges jell ratoni eyebrows nope it’s manure we we use manure from our livestock our sheep and
Goats eat the weeds and then when they defecate they walk on it and enrich the soil it’s probably why it smells so bad who Jessica you do a great sheep voice that was uncanny do it again no no I’m bashful oh all eyes are upon you girl
Dressed as Billy what really wow but hey enough about me back to the manure talk someone’s having your moment way to fill that Chloe barbash popularity void I mean if the B fits wait that doesn’t work ha they loved it anyway now we’ll pick our apples and wash them yes even
Though the washing part is not period accurate braam you have to let that go is it supposed to be kind of hard to find the apples the crop was meager this year the sun god L did not smile upon us also it’s a little late in the season so
You know be cool about it hey Loft hey Loft oh uh I don’t know maybe we should stay here and pick a few more apples so good Jessica come on let’s go uh maybe we put a pin in the hoft I mean this is pretty great right the fresh air
The constant ego stroking from kids who usually ignore me okay fine I’ll just jump by myself maybe I’ll bring you back some hay going somewhere no come now back to the group I found an apple he found an apple and some glue here and a tree there work your magic you pipe
Cleaner tote Mama you’re very talented mom this one is in your most practical design these are uh a little busy but I think we’ve got a shot at at least third place starts for TS we’re getting Gul and we’re done yeah what why aren’t the cow and the trees and stuff on the
Twister it seems confusing she’s brilliant you don’t get it schner well whatever yeah that’s right okay the feeling sturdy is oh but don’t bend over or move your arms or legs so sit down but sitting down is my signature move has everyone given your apples to our cider Millers it’s cider time huzzah
Excuse me is that a beehive it’s an apple crate sir you have to stop asking if things are beehives eventually I’ll be right well I think the quarter was in your armpit all along magic wait how do you do that do that wasn’t that cool what’s wrong Jessica worried Rudy’s
Going to walk away with hero of the Harvest the dumb thing that somehow matters to you more than amazing Hal offs no sheep voice can hold its own okay oh oh you’re so good at Magic uh more like magic huh nothing okay Ry do another trick yeah oh uh great but uh pretend
I’m holding a top hat someone’s getting attention could you be our hero of the Harvest wow for real okay I guess my time is done sorry Jessica and don’t worry I won’t bring up the fact that this whole time we could have been sneaking away and jumping in Hay no
Regrets it was a rush uh yeah okay you don’t know what it’s like to have everyone hanging on your every b i didn’t know what it was like apparently only Chloe knew what it was like but it was glorious please I could have people hanging on all my stuff if I wanted to
Louise this is fourth grade you can’t just an amazing spontaneous sheep impression so good luck with that okay uh watch this I’ve got a little something in my back pocket look how mushed the apples are getting I said how do you do that you make a fist
You keep your mouth mostly closed but you say girl into your hand I can’t do it some people have trouble with it do it again do it again do it again oh are you our hero of the Harvest me are you serious truly though it’s nice just to be considered yes the
Hour of the Harvest Festival has arrived the sack lunches await the PB and JS grow soggy so we’ve kind of got to pick our hero now and you have been chosen what wait so I’m the hero of the Harvest I know right congratulations Louise y Louise I mean I was just bending space
In time with my magic but whatever do it again do it again do it okay okay okay crap that’s good I can’t get enough of that sound no you can’t so weird but I love it be right back getting napkins my corn cob got so here are the Harvest huh are you
Having fun I kind of am finally getting some positive reaction to your do doy thing yeah these people let me do it we did let you do it for a year but it’s all you did so we had to make some rules people were suffering hey guess what me
And Miss lebonza are friends now miss Leons and I sorry now I know where she gets it okay everyone our ritual will begin soon and our hero will be crowned yes yes yes where do you need me over there lights good over there but first we’re all going to learn a traditional
Harvest Dance there’s dancing at apple orchards okay Louise hey Loft want to jumpy jump oh now that I’m here of the Harvest you’ve got hay fever yeah basically okay fine I guess we should do it now if we’re going to do it because after the ceremony there’s probably
Going to be handshakes speeches that whole deal okay calm down hey Teddy Linda what happened you’re supposed to be open by now sorry I had to go to the kids school to fix their costumes and they fell apart before I walked out the door so I had to fix them again it’s
Okay it’s fine I didn’t mind waiting out here in the cold wind Bob’s Burgas hi kids oh no again no no did you sit down I told you not to sit down hang up okay I’m coming back uh Teddy you understand no no no yeah that’s Teddy shouting Tina
Says hi hi Tina Linda don’t leave all right I’ll see you soon yeah yeah yeah bye sorry teddy it’s the costume back get a bun oh a bun okay see you soon look at that Hal Loft could I do this for a living find Hal Lofts I probably
Could are we not going to talk about these the creepy hay dolls I’d talk about them but I’m kind of afraid they’d hear us anyway want to jump yeah and we’ll uh learn the Harvest Dance later in life right absolutely that b i bety in the up in theing leaves are falling down
On the ground woo I do enjoy a good jump one more the dolls are nodding I don’t want to keep my fan base waiting you know how they love a hero but maybe we can squeeze in one more Loft leap at a girl H should we T some more ha down there
It’s looking less fluffy more leg Breaky yeah I hate when my legs get broken oh that’s uh huh what are we looking at here someone standing on a platform with a crown on their head the hero of the heart Harvest judging by the cool corn cop necklace and then they’re
Set on fire uh-huh and then a bunch of crows come and eat them while they’re still on fire what’s that supposed to be I don’t know maybe the Ash and offering to this terrifying face in the sky this is not what a hero of the Harvest wants
To stumble upon in a ha Loft no not at all but I mean they’re not going to sacrifice anyone on a school field trip right we we have really good Chevrons who are protecting us right I don’t have to be worried we’ll probably just do a little dancing do a little crowning I
Might have some cider just to calm my nerves and it’ll all be fine hero of the glory to L there she is our hero of the Harvest has arrived time for the ceremony hero of the Harvest glory to L Lise uh I don’t normally say this but oh run you should
Run are you a a beehive Louise Louise Louise where are you I can’t run anymore so I hope I hope you’re very close over here oh thank God why did you run away screaming shh they’re going to hear you who the creepy peasants who want to light me on fire
And offer up my hero of the Harvest Ashes to the sun god L get this off me get this off me oh wow uh okay that’s not going to happen Louis oh really but why was there a painting in the barn that had exactly that on it oh you went
To the barn that’s not going to look great for me as a chaperon Dad sorry but I mean probably there’s another explanation for a barn painting okay did you not see those terrifying costumes what the horse skull your mother made for Tina and Jean arguably leave team
Twister out of this Louise really though why would they want to do that to you because I’d make the best sacrifice I’m popular now oh you you think you’re popular I mean yeah hero of the Harvest wait what do you mean you think you’re popular no nothing I I mean I that that
Makes total sense I just never imagine the kids would enjoy that noise you make I always thought of it well you know differently and I always thought you were jealous uh look we should get back oh no I’m not going back there Louise I promise they won’t sacrifice you okay
Fine but if I’m right and I get sacrificed I’m going to say I Told You So sounds good uh I think we came from this way hard to find your bearings in a field full of the same tree oh my God what look ashes oh see that’s probably
Just from a fun Orchard bonfire mhm but just to be safe when we get back stay near Miss Leons she’ll protect us MH mhm welcome everyone to the Wagstaff Halloween costume parade some parents complain that the traditional Wagstaff costume contest was just a little too contestyoutube something to do today I
Think we’re really lost now so just an update on that you know it was kind of nice well it was nice the feeling of being popular but I don’t know is popularity that great I mean you also ended up running away from imaginary cult people into the orchard where the
Temperature seems to be dropping rapidly it’s true everyone wants a piece of you sometimes as a sacrifice to the gods hey how far are we from the group miles maybe oh my God what it’s here what oh beehive it’s just like I imagined actually I didn’t really imagine it like
That or I guess there would be someone in a cool beit and they would open it up and my life would never be the same yeah and the queen bee would probably see me and be like hey you get it maybe I just take a quick peek found you oh my god
Bees attack that’s not how bees work I don’t think no it is not everything’s okay we heard you found the paintings so sorry that must have been bad yeah sorry about that the painting is for our haunted Orchard attraction yeah it was for the haunted Orchard not an
Instruction manual for a pagan cult like we thought it might be whoops haunted Orchard yeah for Halloween we do a haunted hay ride for teens and adults that ends with a spooky Pagan Barn ritual you might have seen the really cute hay dolls I made which are not
Historic the bar says off limits Bob I blame you somehow I know but the ashes under the tree we saw some ashes under an apple tree I I told her it was just a fun Orchard bonfire probably no it’s sacrifice school children ases what kidding kidding H funny pagans it’s wood
Ash good fertilizer for the fruit trees I mean not good enough because our crops sucked this year but please come finish this ceremony we’ll take off the costumes it was Braum’s idea to borrow these from the haunted hay ride and use them in a fourth grade field trip in my
Defense I forgot kids were scared of things come on we got to move if we’re going to make it back in time for the costume parade crap okay I guess I could go for a crown and some worship from my peers or we could do some be stuff we
Don’t have time darn it too bad the bees are really great these Panda pants have been itchy me but it was worth it ah itchy itchy itchy okay looks like we have just a few costumes to go more than coach B’s text implied but that’s fine still no Louise
What the hell yeah where is this apple orchard appala next we have Jean Tina and Louise belur dressed as well something complicated wait I don’t see Louise group costume missing part of your group oh God here we go okay then I guess let’s get Twisted Sister damn
It wait I’m here I made it yes right twister there’s supposed to be twister hi kids how’d we do well we left it all on the field I mean not all of it but a lot of parts fell off on the field but we did not win a prize of any kind
Oh no you look so good we worked so hard it was very dramatic though Linda we almost didn’t make it we were running late because this whole thing where Louise thought she was going to get sacrificed on the field trip well tell you later she’s fine anyway we pretty
Much jumped off a moving school bus in the parking lot and then we made it but the judges were dumb I think our kids got robbed I even do in a bit of this but nothing yeah I think people were confused Louis they didn’t remember that part in twister and I thought we
Had a rule about that sound no more doy doy all right well you probably want to do different costumes for trick-or-treating I get it you want to be Pirates or a ghost or something stupid what no if a Halloween costume doesn’t hurt a little bit you’re not
Doing it right plus do you know how many 40s something year olds are going to get this reference and go crazy for it we’re going to be rolling and can aw well then what do you say should we go bigger no no no we’re good we’re good are you sure
What about like a battery powered fan that strapped to Tina blows all the streams oh maybe you’re a real mean guy i’ like top your way so you can’t fly I in love andise sh Happy Valentine’s Day my little chalky Hearts I made you all cards ooh
Mine says I get a th000 kisses give me some sugar mama 1,000 don’t short me woman Louise read your card now I don’t really celebrate Valentine’s Day it’s an invented holiday you know it fine fine it’s the same as jeans card here come your kisses h j can have them hell yes
And here’s your card my little Valentina oh no oh wow Tina was that your stomach yes we may have had a little friendly leftover chil eating contest last night which I won Tina dominated I was like watching someone barf in Reverse well you look a little pale Tina are you sure you don’t
Want to stay home no anything can happen today because today is a day all about love and nothing can stop love oh my God oh my God that’s right Tina nothing stopped me from buying your father a box of chocolates from a kid in the parking
Lot thanks Lynn I I got you something really nice as well yeah really yeah can I have it now you have to wait until a little later is that okay oh my God I can’t freaking wait oops oops oops this opened dark chocolate so dry so bitter why noral Dam
It step right up and buy one of my mini flow love weeds for your Valentine what flower what weeds a weed is just the right plant growing in the wrong place I’m selling bouquet for a buck each who’s in sayy cha hey Jimmy Junior do you have any Valentine’s plans are you
Free today at lunch Valentine’s Day plans today lunch me with you uh yeah no I don’t cool so will you meet me in the gymnasium at lunch I love it already great well what you’re wearing is fine unless you brought something else you probably didn’t wait what did you bring forget that’s yeah
Don’t be late and brush your teeth oh my stomach J boops got to get to the bathroom Zeke is literally selling weeds and people are buying them God this is the dumbest holiday ever yeah love can really make people do some wacky things huh hey are you going to be
At lunch today well I made a reservation why oh I don’t know just checking check just pretending to check a box anyway I should be going bye bye God poor kid picked up the wrong inhaler so why’d you get later for Valentine’s Day Bob well she’s always
Wanted me to learn how to Ballroom down I guess in case we ever go back in time so I well not quite enough because none I’ve had none I didn’t sign up for any it’s Val di what are you going to do Teddy take it easy I was going to try
And learn how to dance on the internet really quick Bob you’ve got time for a real class my Zumba is at a studio and they teach Ballroom there you take one lesson and you be like Jean Kelly if Jean Kelly only had one dance lesson
That’s a good idea Teddy I I should go where is it I’ll go with you I’m back with Pickles I’m going to start cutting them into heart Lynn do you think you can maybe handle the lunch rush by yourself what why I’ve got to go on an
Errand and it may or may not have to do with your gift so romantic Bob tell me what it is Linda I’m no I don’t want to know I don’t want to know forget it forget it get out before I guess it may I please have a hall pass Miss twitchell
I’m having boy troubles I’m sure you understand but it’s also not what you think Hildy it’s Jean are you in there it’s Wednesday I’m here for my day old Taco Tuesday tacos hello what do we have here hey ah you’re not Hildy hello oh you’re yelling at me oh I’ll leave bye I like you right out of here get it I’m kidding she died crap okay Teddy let’s go we’ve tried no no no wait wait wait they offer other classes here you know uh check a look women love any kind of dancing Bob
It demonstrates your virility and your sexual style my sexual style yeah tell them yeah it’s true okay fine uh I’ll just take whatever class starts next we’ll take whatever class starts next really you think I’m not going to take this class with you I did think that I guess that was
Crazy oh shell yes how does a mermaid even ride one of those can I get one bouquet of mini flower love weeds please that’ll be $1 Romeo what are you doing Rudy why are you buying love weeds who’s the lucky ducky let’s just say we’ve been friends
For a while but it’s time to take it to the next level you mean level two oh yeah oh my God Rudy’s going to give me love weed for Valentine’s Day Ry like likes me sick why would Rudy do something like this what kind of idiot like likes someone
Louise Tina yeah hi I’ve been in here all morning oh hi chilly huh yeah all the days to get diarrhea of the butt Jimmy Junior pled something special for me which sized Rudy regular oh don’t you like Rudy no not like that we have a good thing going the way it is we’re
Buddies there’s got to be a way I can stop this sorry sister I hate to tell you this but nothing and I mean nothing can stop love except diarrhea no I’m going to beat this thing I mean I get why he’s on the Louise train I just have
To find a way to get him to jump off at the next stop I got to go if you need TP or newspaper or anything okay actually I need another roll of TP Louise I’ll make it work welcome to hip-hop dance class with Shelly see the way I’m walking with
One of my arms lower than the other in my foot Dragon well that’s hip-hop oh my god oh that’s hip-hop the other day I was in the grocery store buying some light bulbs and ice cream and I could tell the cashier didn’t like my baggy pants but I didn’t care because that’s
Hip hop Deddy we need to get out of here are you kidding me this is the coolest thing I’ve ever been a part of oh I see we have some new students in class STP STP Ma I bet you normally sit on a chair the front way like everyone else but not
In this class in this glass you turn that chair around and sit on it backwards you know why because that hi right right I I I got it nice B okay everybody there’s going to be some profanity coming at you so cover your ears if you oh hey Miss ELO what are you
Doing here on a school day I took a personal day my boyfriend Martin broke up with me no yeah I was totally blindsided that jerk he’s across the street at Jimmy pesto there’s nothing good about that place I like their jalapeno poppers okay that’s one good thing about that place send their pest
Call out his too things Piccolo CAO oh uh hi I only have 5 minutes before recess is over but uh I was wondering if you could maybe slap my wrist again I think I licked all the chocolate off the last slap Mark I don’t know what you’re saying but
It makes me feel like I felt the time I sat on the dryer you want me to uh stir or is this a gift see stir I’m J by the way Isabella so I guess hild’s out sick today sick see see so if that’s our
Lunch is this our dessert no no no Migo this is for me more Francesco oh boyfriend see boyfriend H what great is he in he sounds ugly time to unattracted hey Louise quick question do you like boogers um what I’ve been eating my bugs all morning and oh okay
No want to try one of mine maybe mine are extra good I don’t know that’s pretty gross so what can I get you you want a wet one a dry one feeling sick great but you know what I got to say thewi your eyes are bright your fingernails are strong and healthy
Maybe there’s something to this eating boogers thing I mean hey whatever you’re doing keep it up Sister bye see you at lunch you got to be kidding Me okay doing good feeling confident feeling cool starting to strut oh God the strut was too much no strutting no strutting there she is Jimmy junor what’s going on remember that anti-drug group that came last week to do a presentation you mean Thrills not pills
Yeah they did a number on me I couldn’t believe the national statistics well they left behind all their props including this trampoline so everyone is here to watch us do a sky kiss yeah a what a sky kiss Tina we bounce up and down like this until we get high enough
And then we kiss you want me to bounce on that trampoline uh-huh it’s romantic and dangerous like a candle all I’ll be right back feelings are scary girl n n n why why are you saying that n n n is there a problem I’m I’m just trying to
Tie my shoe that’s not hip-hop peep my feet your shoes are untied that’s hip-hop okay good to know people call me flips white fudge they do you think you could just come up in my mom’s class and learn how to dance wait J’s your mom
She’s your mom no she’s my mom look I I’m just trying to learn how to dance as a gift for my wife for Valentine’s Day well that’s actually incredibly sweet um thank you you’re welcome but if you want a hip-hop you got to prove yourself we’re going to hip-hop dance battle is
Everything all right here uh sort of your son flips white fudge is trying to battle US ah flips we’ve talked about this n ma this is what you taught me if it’s not hip-hop then it’s not hip-hop if they want to learn from you they got
To battle me well he really won’t give this up unless you battle him so I guess you guys are battling we can do this we can beat this guy Teddy we don’t know any hip hop yes we do it’s inside us now untie your shoes b word let’s do this
Right after we stretch out why did I come here oh God oh God it’s happening it’s going down I’m going to hide behind this napkin hey Louise I have something very important to ask you let me stop you right there I was just going look no I
Get it we live in a commercial culture Love is in the movies it’s in all the songs but we don’t have to be Pawns in the ask you to give this love weed and this card to Chloe barbash for me in science what you have science with Chloe
Barbash after lunch right I yeah I think so okay good cuz she’s the most beautiful girl in the world she smells like someone’s baking a cake in her hair it’s her shampoo I heard she uses a whole bottle every time she takes my breath away I mean everything does but
Still thanks Louise you’re the coolest great so Rudy likes Chloe barbash and not me what a Rel oh hey Louise try not to get any boogers on the card Chloe freaking barbash Rudy might as well like a box of packing peanuts she’s all fluff there’s nothing in there
Wow Louise you seem a little worked up about this do I I agree with Louise by the way this is from my house and I brought it here not the other way around got It the chocolate needs more how you say bitter I think the word you’re looking for is butter I have some in my locker if we can’t find any here oh no no not the butter bitter we make dark chocolate dark chocolate no don’t do it it is like
Love Sweet Bitter happy sad don’t use your sensual Italian wisdom on me it’s not fair but game talking you scared mustache uh yes is this it I can’t tell if they started yet I’m going to Janet Jackson this oh flip sweetie are you okay I got
My lips stuck in my braces well I’m injured now so I guess you guys want the battle um okay Mom it’s time to teach these LL fjs how to dance hey Chloe these are from Regular Size Rudy he wanted me to give them to you and the
Card hey thanks that’s it don’t you want to read the card M maybe later that is a lot of shampoo thanks I use it when I take a shower okay class today we’ll be dissecting a banana we only have two so get into groups of 13
That was a delicious Burger Linda I have to admit it really lifted my spirits great I’m sure you’ll start feeling better in a couple days after all you just broke up oh no we broke up a year ago wait wait I thought you broke up today I thought you came here from Jimmy
Pesto no no no he’s at Jimmy pesto I just followed him and I’ve been watching him from your restaurant that’s not alarming I just haven’t been myself since the breakup I mean it’s not like me to sleep outside someone’s house or steal someone’s dog or pee on someone’s
Mail and then watch them open it and laugh oh you wouldn’t do those things but I did I did those things look it sounds like you just need some closure and uh maybe some professional help but I’ll tell you what I’m going to go over there and bring Martin in here you never
Going to get over this unless you deal with it face to face you can’t stab them though okay you’re so sweet to me wait I can or I can’t you probably said can’t what’s taking so long what’s Cena even doing combing her boobs hello Tina you’re here let’s do
This Jimmy junor I walk slowly and carefully back to tell you that I can’t do this Sky kiss with you my heart says yes but my butt says no wait what are you saying cha can I tell you down here it’d be a little bit better for me no
Just shout it out I’m on a trampoline I’m not coming down I have diarrhea okay I have horrible diarrhea if I jump up and down it can explode gross oh girls just diarrhea Big Time nope they don’t actually they don’t I used to think nothing can stop love but it looks like
I was wrong I’m sorry Jimmy Jor So you gave it to her right yeah I gave it to her but listen now we begin operation kiss Chloe barbash wait what the card on the bouquet said to meet mine’s kiss my first kiss my first nonparents and grandmother kiss oh boy Rudy do you really think she likes you
Like like likes you um yeah she made it pretty clear Louise she passes me notes in class all the time check it out Dear cutie bear you look adorbs today what’s the answer to question three on the quiz oh yeah pretty hot stuff huh well I’m
Going to go look in the mirror so I can remember what I looked like before everything changed oh no if I don’t do something about this Regular Size Rudy is getting big time scroy don’t say scroy sorry I brought this coffee filters from home by the way not the other way
Around the is up I know what you’re doing Chloe what are you talking about Louise I know that you’ve been acting flirty with regularized Rudy just to get his quiz answers Rudy’s a big boy if he feels like giving me the answers that’s up to him okay listen he’s not a big boy
He’s regular sized and that kid has more heart and his regular sized body than anyone else in the school and you’re you oh my God you’re freaking out yes because Rudy wants to meet you after school to give you his first kiss and you know what you’re going to give him
His first kiss why would I do do that because he gave me some weeds yes Louise he isn’t the only boy that gave me weeds today this three beanie babies at the last talent show three Rudy is like the slowest runner in our grade he’s the slowest runner in the world everybody
Knows that he shouldn’t be running at all that’s what I’m saying he starts running it after two paces he has to stop to breathe I know it’s so embarrassing yeah and you’re going to suck it up you’re going to kiss that slow man you’re going to kiss slow
Regular size Rudy or you’re going to be eating that lovely through a straw get off of me no it you got her get you just shut I am not kissing him Louise bye damn it she smells so good perfeto mja mja I never thought I’d go over to the dark chocolate side
Oh he is here I must leave who’s here oh right Francesco a Chia Jean Bel chiao Isabella kitchen substitute um sure huh H love it looks like you can’t be stopped yeah she’s just right this way misso what are you doing living my damn life Linda oh hello Martin I have a
Serious boyfriend now his name is him Jim him Jim Jim him Jim well I I I’m going to go quick question do you think I can have my dog back you’re so desperate fine thank you a hi everyone wow Jimmy junor I can’t jump up and down
But I can walk on these tilts wait no I can’t okay got it where did you get those Tina a trampoline and thrills aren’t the only thing Thrills not pills Left Behind they also left these now come on jamy junr we’re going to the gymnasium yeah wait what we’ll be back
In 5 minutes Miss Jacobson Excuse me while I Sky kiss this guy Bob spurgers hi Linda it’s your Valentine can you come outside your gift is here oh my God what wait what’s going on why do you look like that Bob Linda hey there Teddy nice boom box thanks Bob dope pants why
Are you two acting weird what’s going On Bobby did you take a dance class I love it mind if we hop in that hip what uh Meow hey Louise where’s Chloe Rudy I have to tell you something she’s not coming um did did she not get my card she did um but she’s still not coming I do you do you get what I’m saying not really oh God Rudy Chloe doesn’t want to
Be your Valentine but what what about all those notes oh my god get it through your thick round skull Rudy Chloe doesn’t like you but who cares right I guess I care well then stop it stop caring yeah okay thanks for letting me know Louise I guess I was silly to think
I could get a kiss on B Kiss W ow if you tell anyone about this uh-huh I will end you I think I I’m sweating excuse me coming through Emergency Tina good Louise eh Jean get the back a little back back up down side side go go and time brushes down yuck what was that stuff toothpaste so that’s toothpaste all right now hurry up and floss like you’ve been flossing every day for the past 6 months go we don’t
Have any floss we all agreed not to get food between our teeth maybe Dr Yap won’t notice oh he’ll notice Dr Yap notices everything he’s like an eagle soaring through your mouth you know I think I’m going to sit this one out today not so fast Miss Missy those teeth
Are going to get cleaned twice a year here until Dr AB stops taking our insurance why do we even have to get our teeth cleaned what kind of a racket is that Louise we know you hate going to the dentist but come on can we have this
Go smoothly just one time sure sure let me go get my coat she’s going to lock herself in a room don’t make me tackle you got her foot damn it spotless as always Tina you know we don’t always have to make this about business I’m more than just a mouthful of perfect
Teeth and off you go all right all set I feel violated maybe a toy would help okay out come on cup and ball or pirate tattoo ooh ah the old get all the BB’s into all the holes game a classic I’ll Master this when I should be brushing my teeth Jean that’s
Not really the idea got the toy going to go well well well they haven’t ripped up your dental license yet huh Dr yep what’s it made out of is it hard to rip ah hello Louise still afraid of the dentist afraid I’m not afraid you’re afraid you rake of fear whatever you say
Scared C look how about I just sit in that chair for the a lot of time flip through a nature mag and you can still get your Easy Money nope G fine but you’re in and out in two minutes or I start biting no loitering scrape a gum I
Slap your face got it I know the rules Lise you’re the boss in case you forgot all right we need you to open your mouth okay now just uh you’re doing great just the opposite of what I’ve asked you to do just open it are we done
Almost just there you go great great perfect tiny opening I can see through H that was fair that was fair that was my bad I didn’t you need to talk to me you’re right I know it was my fault I just you got real quiet no I know Bob we
Have a situation did Louise hit you yes but that’s not the problem she’s got a cavity wow so oh Lou got her first cavity yeah and it’s a doozy oh it’s so bad look I have a cancellation I can do the filling right this attack is best
This isn’t going to be easy I don’t want to go back in there I really don’t want to go back in there Bob listen you can do this this yep yep all right so I’ll see you later yep all right I need to stretch out a little bit
Yep you know I’m just going to do a little trivial touchup on that second Moler what the hell’s all that for um you have a cavity a cavity no no I’m not getting a feeling hey fill this hey hey you backer I’m sorry I’m sorry it’s fun in
There it’s fun here’s what’s going to happen okay going out this window and that’s the last you’ll ever see of these teeth your parents will bring you back Louise you have a cavity let them I’ll keep running Oh They’ll Never Find me you’re going to wait 10 hey you’re going
To wait 10 minutes till you tell my Dad I’m gone this is what did I just say okay all right 10 minutes I’m sorry body else Yap she’s gone she ran away what she told wait 10 minutes before I told you but I’m a grown man and she’s a little
Girl so I waited 8 you waited 8 minutes to tell me my daughter ran away don’t tell Louise I didn’t wait the full 10 maybe she ran away into the car oh no she’s gone oh my God Louise dad you’re scaring everyone oh sorry yeah Louise yet but we’re going to I don’t
Know she is pretty small when she crouches down she could be anywhere by now and in need of semi-urgent dental care she could have fallen into a crevice do we have those Bobby how deep are they oh God she has to come home I mean she’s 9 years old it’s not like
She’s thought this through exactly where I left it right Candy cell phone I was only seven when I packed this go bag I guess I was just a kid back then hello Louise is that you are you dead oh I’m alive and well and I plan to
Stay that way and don’t bother tracing this call cuz I’m not going to be on long enough Louise honey come home only if you call off that lunatic Dr Yap Louise it’s your father just come home and get the stupid filling sorry Dad that’s not going to happen so uh oh jeez
I guess this is goodbye not how I imagined it what goodbye what do you mean with your family well Mom sometimes these things just don’t work out no way so miss black you want to reserve the duchess suite for an indefinite stay and you have one Mr Bob bel’s credit
Card now all I need to complete this check in is an adult yeah I believe this photo ID said but it’s written in pencil in the background says Wagstaff school picture day Wagstaff was my platoon and N oh man they said there’d be people like you when I came back serving my
Country protecting you I’m going to have to call the police now what so they can give you a ride home Goodbye Louise what a surprise I’m so glad it’s you and not a murderer nope just me as planned remember no and Gil I wrote you weeks ago about staying with you a that darn mailman must be taking my letters if that’s his way of getting me to
Notice him it’s kind of working you remember the cats do I there’s this one and that one oh the the other one oh they like you the farther they walk away from you the more they like you what’s uh what’s going on with the plastic situation over here are you renovating
Your bed n I’m not such a good sleeper so I kind of invented this little game where I’m the last living person in the world oh does that help or yeah this keeps out the radiation and the mutant carnivores that prow the Earth at night
And I sleep like a baby okay well that’s great I’m going to go hit the can well I’ll just call your mom let that my mom said for you to only call her if I don’t get here safe makes sense mhm in case I have to keep running
Cuba’s that way I can just take them out oh suck it up hello Gail it’s Linda hey Lyn it’s me Gail yeah I know hun I called you oh okay listen have you seen Louise yeah she’s here at my place oh thank God but she’s a Gils yes that scheduled visit I
Didn’t know about she ran away Gail oh my where’d she go she’s at your house hun oh right right she’s afraid of the dentist she got a cavity and she doesn’t want to get a filling well who does okay well uh we’ll come pick her up but don’t
Tell her she’ll run oh good thinking Lyn you’re the smart one I’m the hot one no that little Dental Dodger how come Louise gets to run away she doesn’t get to run away I want to run away yeah I could stand to run away it could be
Chapter 4 of my Memoir right after chapter 3 going to the dentist no one else is running away we just need Louise to get that filling good luck with that maybe it’s time for a little creative parenting what do we do Lynn bribe her to get the filling bribe Louise we don’t
Have that kind of money but if she lost a bet I don’t know what’s the bet pack your bags kids you’re running away too yay what are you guys guess who else is running away us Gan and myself what about Mom and Dad they dropped us off
I’m not coming home I know stay at your ank GS great I will forever thanks bet you can’t list the weekend without Gil driving you nuts but I can I love it here yeah can’t I make a wager sure I’ll tell you what if you L the whole weekend
You don’t have to get the filling but if you crack if you can’t hack it you get the drilling and the filling deal of course it’s a deal I can stay here till I’m 30 it’s the most fun studio apartment in the world this better work
It’s going to work cuz we’re going to cheat got a man on the inside hi Mom ready when you are it’s Tina Tina you your daughter Tina okay it’s time to text Tina our first instructions we’re going to raise Gail’s crazy meter to unfun level super
Secret style like a ninja do you know this whole situation is absurd hey you got to fight crazy with crazy well Louise guessed this from your side of the family you don’t think I know that what are you doing stop that go in the hole B’s ah I was so
Close what do you have against Noble the amusements cat hi so um we were wondering if you’d read us your poetry uh what real wonderful wonderful what’s happening Happy things we should send into space a jar of mayo magazine clippings of Scott beo that song that
Starts with cat you’re just like me you go outside and squat TI pee squat squat squat squat yeah woohoo okay that’s oh we got to stop but I’m not done squat the end great poem Ang Gil okay I’ll take that thank you wait but I have so many more
And I want to read them later alone so I don’t disturb anyone when I go H uhhuh well put devastating oh poopsicle Louisa flanked us I think we got to turn up the heat you know I haven’t read any parenting books but I’m pretty sure this wouldn’t
Be in there parenting books there were parenting books um I thought they were that was a joke well there are parenting books I should write a book I call it hey you I saw that put it back that’s yeah y you should do that I know right
Make a fortune mhm hey an do your cat’s claw caps come in other colors what the pretty pores of course I got lots of colors it’s just maybe johnp vanam would be happier in pastel colors it is spring after all you’re so right oh pink eye and Mr B
Let’s change them up well I’ll help yeah if we all pitch in it’ll only take a few hours I’m sure you guys got it covered I’m just going to go cat nail salon Louise you hold Mr business hurry hurry why do I have to have Mr business he’s
The worst one you switch with me hell no oh yeah oh wrap them up with these towels cuz when we take the old pretty paws off they tend to go for the ice just run them up just close your eyes and dive on them thanks so much for
Helping kids now that they made them all pretty the panel have to get me that fourth cat well time to get some shut ey the apocalypse is a for us why why must the world end right when I’m getting sleepy what’s happening oh it’s how she’s sleeps don’t worry about it but
There is an apocalypse every human is dead except for me especially the man so there’s no man so it’s okay to sleep alone good night kids I didn’t k Gail had him in the cat salon for hours well Louise has to be cracking a little right
But we need to push her over the top H wait wait wait remember when Gail hosted a game night and made us play the board game she invented gaale Force wins yes gaale Force wins we should get the kids to play that it’s horrible the rules
Don’t make any sense it takes all day to play it yes gale force wins will drive Louis cuz they’re they’re gone yeah let’s do it yeah let’s go you want me to win yeah yes I did it so what do you kids want to do today
You’re looking at it babe okay great how does butter sound for lunch what am I going to say no to a butter lunch hey an I wish there was a board game that we could play that stimulates the imagination but that was too good for the major board game companies to even
Touch I made a board game that stimulates the imagination but that was too good for the major board game companies to even touch oh I got to make room uh what’s happening now why are you looking at me I’m on the same moving couch as you so if Louise makes it to
Tomorrow morning she doesn’t have to get the filling right but if Gil’s craziness drives her out she loses and yet she wins cuz her cavity will be filled that’s right pretty high level parenting yeah we know what we’re doing Teddy pretty badass but what if Louise flies
The coupe and just goes somewhere else ow wow you didn’t even think of that Bobby well I mean it’s been you have no contingency plan in place all Teddy it’s been mostly Linda’s thing so we’ll uh we’ll stake out GS apartment oh a steak out that sounds fun hey get take out for
Your steak out huh maybe you could order a steak have a take out steak Ste out I’ll get the menus it’s called gaale Force wins it’s more than just a board game it’s fashion cool so how do we play it princess gaale must save the five Realms of world landia from the evil
Wind sent by the wicked sorceress Rebecca who thinks she’s so cute she lives upstairs Louise you go first uh-oh you landed in Spong and dungeon you got to sit with this wet sponge on your head for 30 minutes this game seems pretty weird maybe we should
Go home I’d rather sit here with the wet sponge on my head all day then get that stupid filling nice romantic steak out what is that smell ow Barbie Linda what are you doing here Teddy what are you doing here I was just going to park over there for
A few hours today I happened to see you guys were here and I thought I just got out wait are you crashing our steak out what no I brought pizza oh Pizza hand it over so what I miss you guys taking copious notes can you you mind B just
Scooting up just a little bit a little more is that it it’s as far as it can go should we all just move over to my truck Teddy you know what I’m fine I’ll make it work can you mind crack in a window oh man I landed in cold Soria oh that’s
Hard you could ask Tina for some of her magic ointment but I cluck like an enchanted chicken for 20 minutes to get this magic ointment I don’t know uh-oh your indecision has upset the gale force wins everyone has to start over no we’ve been playing this game for 6 hours and
No one has even made it past the Cliffs of husto the cavity is really bothering you Louise what’s it to you whose side are you want don’t you want me to win stay cool I’m on your side team Louise all the way why are you talking like that
Like what this is how I always talk wait now I don’t remember how I talk is this how I sound never mind just help me get past Rebecca’s monkey Army oh Tina says Louise is losing it hopefully our little girl’s about to snap yeah let’s hope it’s soon Teddy’s apneia is making me
Sick oh God God that one was like 6 seconds he’s breathing how long how long before you die I did it I made it through the weekend I don’t have to get the filling I win I win let’s all celebrate with more sleep and no more talking morning
Sleepy heads oh my god do we sleep through the night we sure did never slept better l l did you know you store what happened do we win what what’s going on it’s morning damn it that little bugger pulled it off she beat us that’s not an option Lyn she needs to
Get that filling or else her teeth are going to fall out okay I was hoping it wouldn’t come to this we’re going to have to make our baby f it Louise how about a victory breakfast of ice cream thanks T that’s a great idea My baby our baby we had to do it it was the only way you going to finish that we it stop we it stop knock knock time to pick up some runaways oh no what’s wrong Louise she ate a bite of ice cream and I guess it
Upset her cavity a Weise couldn’t handle her High Why why is Teddy here yeah why are any of us here think about that wa you kids got further in galeforce wins than I thought you would wait you knew we were playing Gil Force wins oh um I I
Didn’t I just um what what’s a what’s Gil Force wins oh now I get it you guys were behind all of this you cheated how could you ow Dina help this cheat what Mom sorry it’s true we cheated because we love you honey yeah oh that is
Disgusting I hate you guys right now I can’t believe it Louise you got to get that fing I’m fine out honey Now you listen to me I know you’re afraid I’m not afraid I screw it I’m afraid I’m afraid I know a little something about
Fear why don’t you let Aunt Gil help you get through this okay we’re going to turn your fear Bel into make believe that’s not going to work oh let’s do it great now what character do you want to play Agent Yap Gail looking good you’ve been briefed of the situation I have this is the asset I spoke about is the asset willing to do whatever is necessary to save the universe she is and the asset promises not to fight me during the procedure the asset promises then why
The hell are we out here wasting time damn it let’s go let’s go man Sector 8 clear sectors 9 and 10 clear oh that pain is a toxin from our enemy ice cream serum the antidote is in this needle woo oh oh I don’t know okay no
You must the whole universe is counting on you kid proceed oh very good you should be completely numbed in just a few seconds now this might look like ordinary porcelain filling from a sad lonely dentist’s office but this is a microchip of our plans for the most amazing weapon system
Ever oh wait wait a minute please the mission must go on do it get up cover me Barbie go go go grenade flamethrower okay okay all right all right here you got to call in some air support this is crazy we get the point please we got you okay you may have shot
Me too many times but our cause will never die you did it Louise as it you did it and it didn’t inconvenience anyone at all I’ll hug him back to life okay I’m fine yeah yeah Tina he’s fine don’t do that almost there notin let him go Tina get Up when you get to the toy basket get the squirt ring the squirt ring the future depends on it hey you were good in there you too I do a mission with you anytime I hate to say it but I think Gail out parented us maybe we should let her watch the kids
More often oh maybe Gail can move in with us be a full-time Nanny I’m going to call your bluff on that Yes Is Is isra for is For
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